The Way By KMNAHILL@aol.com and MD1016@aol.com OK...here comes the usual legal stuff... get ready... This story is based on the characters and situations created by Chris Carter, The Fox Network and Ten Thirteen Productions. They are being used without permission, though no infringement is intended. All other contents are copywrited to the authors. Lord only knows when this story was started (and it has since taken on a life of its own) but it takes place before Anasazi; before we knew about the implant, before other bad things happened - Melissa is still ALIVE. It is rated R for romantic situations (Mulder and Scully) and adultish content (nothing too graphic). You've been warned if you don't like this sort of thing! Please send comments to the authors (unless they are negative. Then you can just send them *all* to KMNAHILL) but be nice--it's our first time out and we're nervous. The Way What is in the end to be shrunk Must first be stretched. Whatever is to be weakened Must begin by being made strong. What is to be overthrown Must begin by being set up. He who would be a taker Must begin as a giver. This is called 'dimming' one's light. It is thus that the soft overcomes the hard And the weak, the strong. 'It is best to leave the fish down in his pool; Best to leave the State's sharpest weapons where none can see them.' -Tao Te Ching J. Edgar Hoover Building Washington, D.C. The basement office in the J. Edgar Hoover Building seemed dimmer than usual that morning. Special Agent Fox Mulder sat behind his desk with his necktie askew and his sleeves partially rolled up. There was a file opened on his lap and a bag of sunflower seeds opened on the desk. As was his wont when working alone, there was a single lamp lit ; its light illuminating the pages. He wasn't really concentrating well on the task at hand, however, as his mind kept wandering to past cases he and Scully had worked on together. He hated it when Scully was away. Nothing seemed complete. He didn't want to explore the causes for this too deeply but he had his suspicions. He sighed, shutting his eyes and rubbing the bridge of his nose. His daydreaming wasn't getting this case solved. After all, it wasn't his partner's fault that she was called back to Quantico for two weeks of refresher courses. It was odd that he hadn't heard from her though. Mulder looked up as the office door opened, then sat up as well, a grin spreading over his face. "So how was school?" he asked his partner, Dana Scully, who stood in the doorway. "I didn't expect you back until Monday." "You know Mulder, you are not personally responsible for the electric bill of the FBI. I really think they can afford a little more light." She flipped on a couple more switches, lighting the room to more conventional levels. This was a long standing argument. Mulder gave her his boyish smile, knowing that this was the expected response. He stood up and walked around the desk. He had a momentary impulse to hug her by way of welcome but suppressed it. "How was it?" he repeated. She turned away to hang her coat on the hook. She took a moment to pat her hair into place and then sighed. Mulder noticed the slight tremor in her hands. He took a step closer, frowning. She glanced at him, smiled briefly and moved away. She retreated to his chair behind the desk and sat down. "It was fine, Mulder. You know how these things are. Nothing really new." "So how come you're back early?" "As I said-- nothing new. I'm going to get some coffee." She practically jumped from the chair and hurried from the room. Mulder frowned after her again. Scully slowed down as she reached the hallway. She suspected that she had given herself away to Mulder. How could she not when she had run out of the office that way? She had to calm down. Nothing was happening. She *was* fine! There was nothing going on. As she poured her coffee, she noticed her hands. They were trembling again and it was getting worse. Everything was getting worse. She wasn't sleeping well. She was having nightmares; nothing that she could remember distinctly, but it was enough to wake her and leave her too frightened to go back to sleep. Her headaches were coming more frequently and this scared her as well. It was becoming increasingly obvious that the exercises that Melissa and she had been practicing weren't working as well anymore. Worse yet to Scully's thinking, her emotions were getting the better of her. She was losing control and Scully was a person who had always treasured her self-control. She had found herself actually yelling at an elderly neighbor who had irritated her. She apologized but the incident had left her shaking badly. When she'd gone to visit her mother during last weekend's break, she had cried uncontrollably when she looked at a picture of her late father. Her mother was seriously concerned and it had taken all of Scully's persuasion to convince her not to call "Fox." Mulder and her mother had become close while Scully was missing for those three months. NO!!! her mind screamed at her. I can't think about that! Nothing is happening now. Everything is fine. I'm just tired, that's all it is. And if it is something more, I'm doing all I can to make it right again. If only I could remember... "Agent Scully, are you all right?" asked a young agent standing behind her. Dana jumped. She realized that she had been standing there, staring at her hands. "Yes, yes. I'm fine. Just thinking," she mumbled to the agent and then hurried back to the office. If Scully had thought that her partner wouldn't have notice her strange behavior, she was wrong. Mulder looked even more concerned as she stepped into the office, without her coffee. "Scully are you sure you're OK? Maybe you should go home for the rest of the day, start fresh on Monday." Mulder tried to keep his voice neutral but failed dismally. "I'm fine, Mulder." God, how many times had he heard that line, Mulder thought. OK, maybe it was better if she stayed so he could keep an eye on her. Be there if she wanted to talk. "OK. Whatever you want to do," he replied. "Let me show you this case Skinner asked us to look at." They settled down and he began to brief her, occasionally glancing from the file to look at her face. Scully felt herself beginning to blush as he continued to talk. She was losing the thread of the conversation and his voice seemed to lull her into a reverie of random images. She felt so close to her partner. No, he was more than that, she thought idly. He was her friend. No, even more. What then? She looked up at him as he continued his reading. Why is he reading, she thought dreamingly, why aren't we doing what we've wanted to do for so long? A part of Dana's mind was trying to pull itself together, to put a stop to this dangerous train of thought. Something is wrong here, she thought, but she couldn't hold on to the warning. She was too busy studying his face. Mulder glanced up and was stopped by the look on Scully's face. She was staring but it was the something in her eyes that caused his heart to suddenly speed up. They were sitting next to each other and she was leaning over just a little too close. "Scully?" "Fox," she answered and began to kiss him. It was a soft kiss, hardly more that a fleeting touch of her lips to his, as unreal as her dreams had been. Yet, it was filled with a kind of tenderness that only seems to occur in old romantic movies and she sighed as might a leading lady of the thirties. Mulder was stunned. He didn't move because of his surprise and because he was afraid they would both fall off their chairs if he did something precipitous. Mostly, he was stunned. The kiss was starting to become a bit more serious, weightier with reality, when Scully jerked away from him. "Oh, God! What am I doing? What's happening to me?" she moaned. Her face was flushed and her hands flew to her mouth to cover her embarrassment. "Mulder, I'm so sorry!" This time she did jump from the chair and literally flew from the office. Mulder didn't know how to react. He was always a little unsure of how to proceed when Scully lost her composure. It didn't happen often. What the Hell was going on! He couldn't answer that but he did know that his partner was in trouble. That was enough. He got up to follow her out of the room. Scully knew she should slow down. She was causing a commotion. Federal agents do not run down the corridors of a Federal building. But she couldn't stop. She kept repeating the scene which had just occurred between her and Mulder in her head. What had she done? Why? She had to get out, go home, figure all this out. There had to be a reason. It had to make sense, somehow. I have to remember! As she rounded a corner, she ran straight into the arms of Assistant Director Skinner. He had to hold her for a moment before she could regain her balance. "Agent Scully?" His voice indicated his surprise, as did his raised eyebrows. "What's going on here?" Dana jumped back. Her usual response of, "Nothing, sir," died on her lips. Obviously something was going on. She just couldn't figure out what it was. All she could do was look at the man who was sometimes friend, sometimes not. There was no escape. It was becoming to strong to fight. Dana suddenly knew what she had to do, it was the only way to stop it, stop them. Oh Missy, Scully thought, I hope I do this right. Just then, Mulder appeared around the same corner. He wasn't going as fast as Scully had been so he had time to stop before causing another accident. "What is going on here?" Skinner repeated, looking from one agent to another. He had just enough time for the look of worry on Mulder's face to register before Scully collapsed in his arms. ***** Agent Mulder sat in front of Assistant Director Skinner's desk with a distracted, worried frown on his face. He should be at the hospital. He needed to be there in case she woke up. He needed to be doing something. He sighed instead. This interview wasn't going well. There was little to tell Skinner and that frustrated both men. "All right Agent Mulder, let's go over it again." Walter Skinner wasn't any happier than Mulder. He liked Agent Scully, thought her a definite asset to the Bureau, and a good person. She was good for Mulder as well. He didn't like mysteries. What had happened yesterday was a mystery. Scully was still unconscious for no discernible reason. Before that, she was behaving, to say the least, out of character. "Preliminary investigations report that orders had come through for her to go to Quantico for routine refresher training. We knew this," Mulder began, hardly glancing at the files in his hand. He had committed them to memory long ago. "Agent Scully attended her classes for the first four days as expected. No noticeable problems. Then her attendance had become more erratic. Her instructors had been told that she was on special assignment and that they should expect these absences. Further inquiries, however, revealed that no one could be sure where these instructions had originated. No one saw her during these unexplained assignments. She seems to have vanished off grounds." He paused to gather his thoughts and took a deep breath before continuing. "Several of her classmates and instructors verified that Scully was becoming more tense as time went on. She had been involved in a couple of arguments, nothing really major. She had reported on several occasions to the infirmary complaining of a severe headache. She told the base physician that she had been having difficulty sleeping. Since this wasn't a new complaint among agents involved in the strenuous classes the physician apparently passed off her symptoms as stress related, gave her some mild pain relievers, and told her to try and get more rest." He snorted his opinion of the base physician. "Continue, Agent Mulder," replied Skinner, though he held the same opinion. "Two days before classes were scheduled to end, Scully packed her bags and left. Once again word came down that she was to be excused from further classes. No one can trace where that word came from. Until she arrived at FBI headquarters in Washington yesterday morning, Scully had had no contact with any known person." He stopped as he finished the official report. "That's all I know, sir. I wasn't expecting Scully until Monday. I hadn't talked with her since she had left." Mulder had told Skinner about her behavior when she had arrived in the office but not about the kiss. That was private. They would need to deal with that together. Skinner looked up from the notes he had been taking to study the man sitting before him. Mulder looked like shit if truth be told. He hadn't slept, probably hadn't been back to his apartment. There was something more that Mulder hadn't told him Skinner assessed but trusted that Mulder knew what he was doing. If anyone could find out what was going on, this man could do it. Technically, Mulder should not be involved with this investigation. He was too close to the situation to be objective. On paper, Mulder wouldn't be involved. In reality, Skinner knew how pointless in would be to tell Scully's partner to back away. He didn't even bother to try. "That will be all for now Agent Mulder. Report to the hospital and check on Agent Scully's status." Mulder stood and headed for the door. "Oh, and Agent Mulder, keep me informed." Mulder nodded. There was nothing more to say. Mulder was relieved. He was half afraid that Skinner would order him to stay away from Scully. By sending him to the hospital, he was giving Mulder tacit permission to continue his search for the truth. The problem was he didn't know where else to search. As Mulder walked down the hospital hallway towards Scully's room, he wasn't surprised to see Margaret Scully standing in corridor. She was waiting for him. She watched him approach as she had all those times they met while Scully was missing. She even had the same look on her face. "What happened to my daughter? her eyes seemed to say. There was never any blame in that look, just the question. That and the trust that he would find the answer. "Hello, Fox," Margaret said. She never called him Mulder. Mulder nodded. "How is she?" he asked, afraid of what answer he'd get. "About the same. The doctor just left but..." She left the sentence hang in midair. Again Mulder nodded, there was little need for words when he was with Margaret. He smiled to himself. Like mother, like daughter, he thought. Mulder opened the door to Scully's room and stopped. There stood Melissa, Scully's sister, holding a crystal over Dana's body. Mulder caught his breath. Memories flooded him. As he watched the tableau before him, his feelings of guilt and frustration overwhelmed him. Last time, Scully was dying. This couldn't be happening again. "Hello, Mulder. Come in and shut the door. I've been waiting for you." Melissa looked up and smiled briefly. She and Mulder had never really gotten along but they weren't enemies either. This was too important for past misunderstandings to interfere. She was used to people who held different beliefs and who were intolerant to hers. "She's not dying this time, at least not physically. This may be worse." "What do you mean by ' something worse?'" Mulder asked suspiciously. He had little patience for Melissa's crap right now. Melissa's gaze was steady and held his eyes. The silence between them lengthened. It was Mulder who looked away. He owed her. He may not believe in her methods, but he owed her a lot. Maybe it was time he listened to her. She noticed the shift in his stance, could follow his thoughts by watching the play in his eyes. Melissa was always amused by people who would label her "psychic." So much of her "talent" was nothing more than being quiet enough to listen to what was said and what was left unsaid. It was easy enough to fill in the blanks. The hard part was being quiet. Melissa drew that quiet around her now. She needed to focus on the man before her. He was the key to what was happening to Dana. Her sister had found her way home before. The cords which bound Dana to her family were strong but Melissa could almost see the silver links tying her to Mulder. How to make him understand? How to explain this in terms he could accept? Words were a limitation. Melissa slowed her breathing, reaching for calmness as she would for warm tea on a cold afternoon. While she acknowledged her impatience, she also realized it had no place in the current situation. It would only hamper her efforts. "Why don't we go somewhere and talk? Maybe I can explain," she said and tentatively held out her hand as if offering a truce. Mulder glanced at Scully, torn between wanting to stay and yet needing to do something. Finally he nodded and followed Melissa out the door. ***** They met in a darkened room. One got the impression that light would only have mocked the conversation taking place. It was more appropriately held in the dark. They all wore finely tailored suits and didn't fidget with their ties. It was if they were in uniform. "Why isn't she reacting as planned?" asked the older man, his voice assuming the tone he used when addressing underlings. "That is not entirely clear, sir. Everything had seemed in order. The results of the preliminary tests were quite positive. We had initial resistance, of course, but we expected as much. We were able to re-establish linkage once we overcame her defenses. Nothing should have interfered at that point." This man was younger than the first, more unsure of his position, of his vulnerabilities. "It was a mistake. It was a mistake to send her back so soon. It was a mistake to send her back the first time! I've said that from the start." Although he spoke emphatically, the older man was smug that he was proved correct. "Separating her from Mulder was the best attack plan we had. He is less effective without her!" The third man in the room leaned forward out of the shadows. He slowly exhaled the cigarette smoke and smashed the butt into an overflowing tray. His action caught the attention of everyone else in the room. "Mistakes can be corrected." ***** It was a fine Spring day. One of the pleasures about this part of Washington is the number of little parks that dot the cityscape. They play havoc with traffic patterns but they were nice to have anyway. Mulder knew one such park, close to the hospital, and steered his companion towards it. The trees and bushes surrounding the bench gave an illusion of being in a quiet country setting. Even the noise from the city streets seemed muted. They were quiet as they left the hospital and the silence, as they walked to the park, had become a solid encasement which isolated them from each other as well as from passers-by. Those who witnessed their progress thought them a striking pair. Both tall and handsome, Mulder and Melissa gave the appearance of metropolitan chic. Their isolation added the aloofness that completed the picture. As Mulder seated her, he took a moment to study his partner's sister. He rarely saw Melissa. Of course he rarely saw anyone not related to work. There was little physical resemblance between Scully and her sister. He had assumed there were few similarities in other areas as well. Slowly, he began to revise this opinion. There was a strength of character, a willingness to stand by her beliefs, that allowed him to see Melissa differently. Could she know something? Was it really possible or was this wishful thinking? "Mulder have you ever heard of the Tao Te Ching?" Melissa finally asked. Of all the myriad of questions Mulder thought she would ask, of all the flaky statements she could make, Mulder was least prepared for this one. "Is this a pop quiz?" "No. The Tao Te Ching is a book of Chinese axioms, specifically describing the Tao, or The Way." Mulder could hear the capital letters in her voice. "The Way is a method of dealing with power by non-action, non-thought. The way of holding on to true power is by not holding on to it. More by giving it away. It talks about the illusion of dualistic thinking." Mulder started to shift impatiently. A discussion of Chinese philosophy wasn't what he had in mind. Again he was caught by her steady gaze and forced himself to calm down. "There's a quote that says,' Best to leave the State's sharpest weapons where none can see them.' Mulder, I think that someone is trying to use Dana. Turn her into a weapon. That's what she's fighting. You need to find the people doing this to her. You need to stop them." ***** There were lights, some bright, some shaded, with color and without. Voices murmured in her ear but they were indistinct. At times she thought she heard her name being called. She tried to answer, tried to respond, but couldn't remember how or why she should. If she focused, she could remember not to struggle, not to respond. What was it Melissa was trying to tell her, trying to explain? Action by non-action; being by not-being. Resist by not resisting. She felt as if she were floating. Nothing was solid around her so she couldn't claim to be in a room. She couldn't claim to be anywhere except here, now, in this time; and yet she felt as if she were everywhere. She was safe here but was alone. Something was missing. Or was it Someone? She couldn't remember but it seemed as if it was getting dark. She was suddenly afraid; afraid of being alone in the dark. Perhaps it was time. Dana wasn't sure but she had done as Melissa had suggested and it had worked. But she couldn't stay here forever. She needed to come to this place of refuge. It had been the only way. She wished she could have warned Mulder what was happening to her, what she feared they were doing to her but it had sounded foolish, paranoid. Unfortunately, there hadn't been time. Once she began piecing things together she knew she would need to act quickly. When she had kissed Mulder...Dana shied from the thought, the feel of that kiss. That had been the signal that she was finally losing control. She had to leave. Perhaps it was now time to return. Dana began to marshal her strength and concentration. Her breathing deepened and she focused on the return of physical sensation. She could almost feel Mulder beside her. No, not Mulder! Someone else. Something was wrong. Suddenly the world around her exploded into fire and sound. She was lost. ***** Mulder could only stare at Melissa. Did she think he didn't know that there were people, nameless, hidden people that would like nothing better than to rid the world of Scully and himself? If he could find them, expose them he would. He started to get up. "Where are you going?" Melissa asked. "Back to the hospital. If I needed you to tell me what to do, I could have saved us this walk." "Oh sit down, Mulder! We don't have time for this. Now listen to me." Mulder sat down looking like a thunder cloud. He would give her two minutes to explain and that was it. He'd had enough. "About a month ago Dana came to see me," Melissa began. " I don't have to tell you how surprised I was to see her. Don't get me wrong, I love my sister. More than you could probably appreciate." She stopped as she saw his wince of pain. "Oh God, Mulder, I'm sorry! Really! I wasn't thinking" He nodded he acceptance of her apology and urged her to continue. "Anyway, Dana came by very upset. It was early . She told me that she had been having trouble sleeping. She was having a lot of nightmares. But she could never remember them when she was awake. She thought that memories of her abduction were starting to resurface and didn't want to come to you about them." Mulder's head jerked up. "Why?" "I asked her the same question. If anyone would believe her and help understand what was happening, it would be you." Mulder grinned his appreciation of Melissa's support. "At the time, Dana was more concerned about what this might do to you, Fox. She feels the guilt you carry with you. It's misplaced but you wear it like a banner and Dana , well let's just say Dana didn't want to add to it. I did argue with her about it, thought it best that the two of you talk but..." Melissa shrugged and let the sentence hang there. "What else did she say?" "She talked about feeling as if she were losing control of her emotions. It was as if someone were erasing her ability to reason, to stay objective. Encouraging her to give vent to whatever emotion seized her. You know Dana better than any of us do, Mulder, you know what losing control would mean to her. She was more frightened than I think I ever saw her." Mulder winced again against the image that Melissa was drawing for him. He had seen Scully in frightening, terrifying situations and almost took a perverse delight in maintaining her composure. To think that she might be losing that... On the other hand, by the very nature of their work, it was possible that Scully was beginning to burn out under the stress. Sometimes everyone lost control. "What made her think that someone else is involved in this? That someone is using her?" "She didn't. She thought she was being paranoid, cracking up. I know few saner people than my sister. She was being influenced by something or someone." Melissa hesitated as if afraid to give voice to her next statement. "I could feel this influence, see its aura, sense its maliciousness. It intends to do evil. I also sensed that its ultimate target is you, Mulder." Melissa barely said the words aloud. Her usual confidence in her beliefs sagging under the weight of responsibility she felt towards her sister. Somehow she had to convince Mulder of her sincerity and of the truth of her words. Mulder sat, his look unfocused as if trying to hear some inner voice that would confirm the truth of Melissa's words. "You said 'something' or 'someone,'" he said finally. "Yes. I don't know how they're doing to Dana what they're doing, drugs, machines, some other agency; I'm not sure. But I do know that there's a human factor in this. There is a sense of the familiar about it. You and Dana know your assailants." Mulder started to rise again. He turned to assist Melissa but she shook her head. "There's more, Mulder. I know why Dana's unconscious." Mulder was stunned. "Why?" he breathed. "When I saw what was happening and convinced Dana that she wasn't going crazy, I told her that there might be a way to counter what was going on. She didn't believe me at first but was willing to try just about anything. I began to teach her certain meditation techniques which stress the importance of giving in to your opponent and thus defeat him. It takes too long to explain the theory fully but..." Melissa shook her head in frustration. "Think of it this way. If someone grabs you, what would that person expect you to do?" "Pull away." "Right, but it's a basic principle of most of the martial arts to push into the attack. Why?" "To push the assailant off balance." "Yes! Exactly right. The meditation I was teaching Dana was designed to do the same thing, only mentally." "But what happened? Why can't she wake up?" "I'm not sure entirely. She was making good progress when she had to leave for that training school. She told me she would continue with the exercises but the techniques take years to learn. I can only guess that Dana was desperate enough to take herself to the very edge. If she's still under attack, she'll stay there. If you can find out where the attack is coming from, I can try to reach her and help her back." "Alright, I'm going to need..." Both of them jumped at the sound of Mulder's cellular phone. Impatiently, Mulder pulled it from his coat and flipped it open. "Yeah, Mulder." Mulder listened for a moment turning deathly pale. "We'll be right there." He closed the phone and grabbed for Melissa's hand, pulling her to her feet in one movement. "Fox, what is it? What's wrong?" "We have to get back to the hospital," he replied grimly. "Someone's shot Scully." ***** Mulder could never remember how he got them back to the hospital. Since the call had come Assistant Director Skinner, Mulder was not surprised to see him standing in the hallway by Scully's door. Margaret Scully was there as well. Mulder noted that Skinner had an arm draped around Margaret's shoulders to comfort her. There was something about the woman that demanded that she be comforted. Despite her strength, or maybe because of it, Mulder felt very protective of this woman. Standing next to Skinner was a woman dressed in scrubs. Blood stained the left shoulder of the suit. She had long dark hair which had been pinned in the back but was beginning to fall. She held an ice pack to the side of her face where bruises were beginning to show. Melissa instantly took her mother into her arms and moved her apart from the others. Mulder glanced at the other woman then looked to Skinner for explanations. "How is she? What the Hell happened?" He was able to voice his questions without shouting but his intensity spoke volumes. "Agent Scully was attacked by an unknown male. Apparently, he had been watching for his chance. Mrs. Scully had just left to speak with the attending physician. Scully was alone." Skinner glanced at Melissa and then returned to Mulder. The question in his eyes was not yet an accusation. "We were talking. Ms. Scully has some theories about the cause of Scully's condition." Mulder knew it sounded lame but he was more concerned about Scully's current situation than Skinner just now. Skinner simply nodded, filing away the information for later. There were more important things to consider at the moment. He turned to the woman next to him. "This is Special Agent Michele Hardesty. We'd worked together at my last station and she recently transferred to Washington. I asked her to come over ,undercover, and keep an eye on things. She got more than she bargained on." Skinner paused and spared her a quick look and a grim smile." As she walked into Agent Scully's room, she found the suspect with a gun at Scully's head. She threw a chair and it deflected the shot enough to save Scully's life. Unfortunately, she got clipped by the assailant as he ran." Mulder swallowed. It had been that close. Another few seconds and... But it didn't happen. He had to hold onto that. He looked at the agent who had saved his partner's life. "You, OK?" he managed to ask around the lump in his throat. "Yeah, fine. I should have grabbed the guy as he ran past but he was so damned fast. I'm sorry." Mulder could only stare. Skinner looked heavenward as if for inspiration. Or exasperation. "Agent Hardesty, you just saved Agent Scully's life, almost at the cost of your own. I don't think we need to belabor the issue that the suspect got away!" "How's Scully?", Mulder asked. "She'll be fine. The bullet only grazed her. The doctors have her sedated, however." Skinner managed to look both relieved and concerned at the same time. "She's awake?" "She was but she seemed disoriented. That's why they sedated her. They want to run some more tests to be sure that the bullet didn't do more damage." Mulder's eyes connected with Melissa's. She nodded and led Margaret into Dana's room. "Agent Hardesty, thank you." The words sounded inadequate to his ears but Mulder didn't know what else to say. He solemnly proffered his hand. "Thank you." After a quick look at Skinner, he, too, went to check on his partner. Skinner looked after him a moment, then turned his attention to Agent Hardesty, his eyes softening slightly." Tough first day on your new assignment. You're sure you're OK, Michele?" I'm OK, Walt. Quit worrying," Michele responded, lightly touching his arm. "You up to filing that report? I'd really like a more detailed description of this guy." "Sure thing. Let me get cleaned up then I'll head over to the office. I can't help thinking though that this guy wasn't going to kill Agent Scully until I walked in on him. He wasn't standing right." She shrugged. "I'll head for home when I'm done at the office." She turned to leave. " Michele?" Skinner said, lowering his voice and looking over his shoulder. "I'm glad you decided to come." Agent Hardesty smiled as she left. Margaret was sitting by Dana's bed, holding her hand. She couldn't have gotten much sleep in the last couple of days, Mulder thought to himself. None of us have. He was suddenly overcome with feelings of fondness and warmth for her. They had been thrown together by their mutual fear for Scully's life but now they were bound by respect and trust. Melissa was standing on the other side of the bed, one hand resting lightly on Dana's forehead. Her eyes were closed, her face calm. A self-satisfied smile appeared. She opened her eyes, sought out Mulder's, and with a slight inclination of her head, indicated she wished to speak to him out of Margaret's hearing. Mulder followed her across the room. "I think she's going to be OK, Fox. I don't sense whatever it was that was trying to control her, at least not for now. I can't be sure how long that will last though, or what else they might try." "You don't think that's because she's sedated?" "No. She's only slightly sedated according to what the doctors told Mom. She'll be waking up soon. It's getting late and I want to get Mom to eat something. You'll be here?" It was more of a statement than a question. He nodded. "Mulder, you do realize that this attack may have been precipitated by the resistance that Dana was offering, don't you? They may try again. Dana has to try to remember what happened to her while she was gone. That's going to be the key." " I know. You go eat. I'll be here." ***** Melissa and Margaret had left and returned. Mulder finally convinced them to go home and to try and rest. "I promise to call when she wakes up," he said. "Now go home and get some sleep. She'll need you in the morning." That had been three hours ago. The hospital was quiet now, staff speaking in hushed voices so as not to disturbed their patients. Mulder sat next to Scully, studying her face. He was glad to finally have this time alone with her. His face mirrored the feelings that he normally kept hidden, from her and from himself. It had been so close this time. He thought about Melissa's feelings that this attack was ultimately directed at him. He had considered trying to dissolve his partnership for her sake, to distance her from his work. She might be safe then. But he knew that wasn't the case. She was too involved already, knew too much, had seen and had been through too much. It was safer if they stayed together, partners. They, whoever they were, would have to deal with Mulder and Scully together. That decided, Mulder could only wait. Scully, her face pale but calm, stirred. Mulder sat up and leaned towards her. "Scully?" he said, his fingers brushing her cheek. Scully opened her eyes and looked at him. "You're here." She smiled. "I didn't want you to wake up, alone, in the dark," he whispered. ****** Agent Scully's apartment, Two days later. Scully was asleep in her bed with a sheet covering her legs. The bedroom door was cracked just enough so that Mulder could hear her gently breathing while he lounged on her sofa, remote in hand. Hours ago he had muted the TV, trying to convince himself that it would disturb Dana. Although he knew she was still groggy and, at the moment, sleeping so soundly he could be drilling holes in her walls and she wouldn't stir. But, with the TV muted, he could hear her every sound. This made him feel useful. The situation was frustrating for Mulder. The doctors said there was nothing more that they could do for now - the additional tests would take a couple of days so it was decided Dana would be more comfortable at home. And safer. Agents were posted outside the apartment building, and of course, Mulder was there with her. Skinner kept Mulder off of the primary investigative team citing rules and regulations and something about being too close to the heart of the matter and clouded judgment. At least here, listening to Scully sleep, he would be ready if she woke disoriented again. Or he could soothe her through a bad dream. But, Mulder sighed, Scully was as self-sufficient sleeping as she was awake. He had been there for over twelve hours and she hadn't needed him once. He nursed a glass of ice tea, as he switched to another channel. And then another. The door bell rang. Mulder looked through the peep hole, smiling as he opened the door. "Mrs. Scully," he greeted her in a whisper. "She's still asleep." "I know, Fox, but it's my shift. 9 pm." Margaret tossed her purse and coat on the kitchen table, and then turned back to Mulder who was still hesitating by the open door. He didn't want to leave. She saw the floundering look in his eyes as he searched for an excuse to stay just a little longer. If he wasn't here, he thought, then he'd be sitting at home. Out of ear shot. Margaret understood. "Fox, would you mind staying for a little while? I'm going to make some gingerbread cookies and I'll need a taster." His eyes whispered her a silent "thank you". They both knew, instinctively, that there was really nothing to be done, and somehow tasting gingerbread cookies would pass the time. By midnight, five batches of cookies were laid to cool on racks, the dishes had been done, the floor had been mopped (following a minor spill), and Margaret and Mulder sat at the kitchen table, a plate of cookies and two nearly empty glasses of milk before them. "So, Dana went as an angel to the Halloween Party." Margaret struggled to get out between giggles. "And her father was called at work..." she gasped. "And when he got her home, he bellowed: 'I was called out of a meeting with an Admiral to pick up my 'little angel' from Sunday school! Dana, are you trying to tell us something?'" The memory was so delicious for her, that Mulder took just as much pleasure in watching her tell the story as he did in hearing it . Margaret quieted down some and then added: "He never really understood Dana, but he did love her." Her eyes lifted and met Mulder's. "But you understand her." Mulder didn't feel uncomfortable by this last statement. It wasn't demanding anything from him, or forcing him into anything. It was simply an observation and an accurate observation at that. He nodded once and then finished off his milk. "Mom? Mulder?" Dana stood clinging to the post that separated the living room and the kitchen, still groggy and unbalanced. Mulder bolted up and immediately steadied her. "Dana, sit down. Are you OK? Sit. You should be in bed. Here, sit in the chair." Mulder helped her into the seat. Margaret poured her daughter a glass of water. "Are you feeling okay, Scully? Scully?" Now that she was seated her eyes were foggy again and her features seemed glazed over. She wasn't responding to him and it threw Mulder into a panic. "Scully!" He held her head so she had to see him. As her eyes finally came to focus on his, she felt a wave of nausea sweep over her entire body. Her arms lurched out and she balanced herself on the table. Margaret reached to her daughter and holding her arm, she pushed the glass of water closer to Dana, who, looked to first to her mother and then the glass. Slowly, she sipped the cool liquid. And slowly, as she emptied the glass, she felt her body steady and her thoughts work themselves free of the cloudy, sleepy, haze. Dana looked to Mulder crouching next to her, observing her closely, looking concerned. She inhaled and smiled at him. "I smell gingerbread." And he returned her smile. It grew from deep inside his stomach and reached out like a halo around him. Margaret felt her daughter's forehead, kissed the top of her head, and sighed. "You're feeling better, now?" Dana reassured her mother, "Yeah, fine. Tired. But fine." Tired was an understatement, but she wanted the fussing over her to end. For some reason Dana couldn't pin down, she felt very self-conscience with Mulder and her mother here. What had they been talking about? Oh, GOD! Had she said that out loud? No. Good. Dana's head began to swim again. "Then it's time for Mulder to leave. Fox," Mrs. Scully said in her most maternal voice, "go home and get some sleep. You can come back and see Dana in the morning." Mulder looked up at Margaret with a six-year old's eyes. "You do need to get some more sleep, Dana. But maybe I should stay here. Sleep on the couch. You know, just in case." "No, Fox," corrected Mrs. Scully. "I'll be here...just in case." She wrapped the cookies in plastic, and cleared the table of the glasses. "And Dana and I will see you tomorrow." she had that all-powerful "mother" look on her face - the look Mulder couldn't argue with. "Alright." He surrendered. "I'll be back tomorrow." Mulder looked back to Dana, her round, blue eyes following his every movement. He saw she was smiling at him and he touched her cheek. "Sweet dreams." he whispered. Dana could smell the ginger on his breath and she inhaled deeply, feeling sleepy all over again. A hand went to her face as she stifled a yawn, and tears moistened her eyes. She knew that she had just woken up, but she honestly couldn't recall when she had been sleepier. "I am so tired." was all she could get out. She began to lean forward against Mulder, slipping back into the realm of sleep. He held her shoulders to keep her on the chair; but, as her head nodded forward, he slipped his hands around her waist and stood her up, supporting most of her weight. "Let's get you into bed before you start dreaming." Margaret watched him scoop her up and carry her out of the room. She saw how Dana rested her head comfortably in the crook of his neck and smiled. They just naturally moved together. Dana mumbled a small: "So tired..." and they entered the darkened bedroom. Mulder laid Dana gently on the cool sheets and covered her. "Mulder, wake me up in time for class." "Class?" Mulder grinned, thinking that she must already be sleeping. "I think you can miss class-" "Nooooooo..." she breathed. "They made me miss class..." Her face twisted in frustration. Leaning closer to her, Mulder asked, "Who made you miss class? Dana?" She breathed with effort and her lips opened but nothing came out. "Dana?" "Let her sleep, Fox." Margaret stood at the door. She was stern, and Mulder jumped up. Margaret lead him gently, by arm, to the front door. Mulder turned to her. "I think I should stay." "No." "But what if she..." he didn't know how to finish the sentence. He was back to feeling useless. "I could...if she..." "If she needs you, Fox." Margaret smiled. "I'll call you." She understood his frustration, but Dana's health was what was important now. The lost look in his eyes, the confusion leaving his lips, it would all be cured once Dana was well, again. So, for now, Margaret would see that Dana got well. And as far as she knew, until the doctors told her otherwise, that meant rest and peace and quite. "You have my number?" "It's by the phone. Goodnight, Fox." "Alright." His eyes dropped and he turned and closed the door behind him. And after a moment, Margaret secured the lock. ***** Breakfast was laid out on the table when Dana woke the next morning, and Margaret and Mulder were, once again sitting and chatting. Dana stumbled into the kitchen. "Is this deja vu? Or am I still dreaming?" "Good morning sweetheart." Mrs. Scully was surprisingly chipper on just a few hours sleep. Dana found a chair and threw her body into it. Mulder handed her a glass of juice and smiled. Scully had slept hard, and it was difficult for her to get her body to respond. "I'm going to take a shower." Dana put her hand to her face and brushed her reddish bangs back and out of her eyes. "And wash my hair." She took a gulp of the juice and pushed herself out of the chair. The water felt warm and clean against her bare back. She stretched and swallowed a deep breath. Showers have a way of cleaning off the day before and starting the new day fresh. Dana loved taking morning showers with her rose scented soap. She yawned again and thoroughly enjoyed her shower. Margaret got up wiping her hands on a towel as the phone rang. "Hello." "Mom? It's Missy." "Missy, how are you dear?" "I'm fine, Mom. Is Dana OK? I need to talk with her." "She's still very tired and weak. I don't think this is a good time, Missy." "Mom, this is important. I have to talk with her about what happened." Margaret chewed on her lip for a moment. She loved Missy but didn't want her upsetting Dana. The doctors had stressed the importance of Dana getting plenty of rest. "No, Missy. Not now. Dana is in the shower and then I want her to relax. I'll tell her you called and she can talk with you tomorrow." It was Missy's turn to sigh. Mom was in her protective mode and short of storming Dana's apartment, she wouldn't be able to discuss things with her sister. "OK, Mom. Just tell her I called and she can call me in the morning." "Alright , dear. I'll tell her. Bye." She gently replaced the receiver. Once Dana was dressed, with hair blown dry, and light make-up applied, she looked like she always had - except now she was well rested. Mulder studied her over coffee and wondered why he'd never noticed how her hair glowed in the yellow morning sunlight. The extra sleep, he reasoned. Margaret finished her coffee and announced, "Well, I'm off. I've got a full day. But I'll be back by 7 o'clock to make sure everything's okay." "Mom, I'll be fine now, you don't have to keep checking up on me." Dana was getting that uncomfortable 'center of attention' feeling again. "Besides, I'm sure there's plenty of work at the office that should have a dent put in it-" "Scully, no work for you today." Mulder was adamant. "Mulder." her protest didn't get far. "Scully, I'm sure as hell not going in today, and if you go in, you'll make me look bad." Mulder raised an innocent eyebrow. Who could argue with that logic? "Dana, you have to take it easy. Pop in a movie. Read a book. The lab tests from the hospital should come back tomorrow. Don't do anything until then." Mrs. Scully collected her coat and purse. "Dana, promise me." With a huff, she responded a resolute, "Okay." "Alright, Dana. I love you sweetheart." And with that (Dana's word had always been enough for Margaret) Mrs. Scully was out the door. ***** "I can't watch any more of this movie, Mulder." Scully lay limp across the couch, head in Mulder's lap, suffering from a serious case of TV coma. "Turn it off." One click on the remote, and the TV blinked off. Other than the click, nothing else moved. Mulder had one hand on Dana's head, his feet propped up on the coffee table. Scully had a hand on his leg just in front of her face and the other...must have been under her asleep somewhere...she couldn't feel it any more. They just sat like that. For at least ten minutes. Mulder figured she must have fallen asleep and didn't risk moving and waking her. But then she sat up abruptly, and piped in with, "Let's have ginger bread cookies." He watched her stand and make her way into the kitchen and out of view. And without even thinking he rose and followed her. They broke out the cookies, each taking a bite and moaning with pleasure. Scully reached in the fridge and retrieved the milk. Once she poured each of them a glass, she handed one to him. As Mulder took it from her, his long fingers grasped her hand by mistake. The sensation of his skin on her hand caused something inside her to jumped. This wasn't the first time that had happened, but it took her unguarded and the glass slipped and shattered. She jumped again and steadied herself on the counter. "Dana - are you all right? Dana?" "I'm fine." she breathed. And breathed again. Then she remembered the kiss. In the office. Before. It flooded through her head in slow motion. Eyes wide and mouth open she gasped, "Oh, God." "Dana?" he took a step closer to her, glass crunching under his feet. She reached out an hand to stop him, and it came to rest on his chest. "I kissed you, Mulder." He froze. He had just assumed that she had forgotten; that they would deal with it at a later time. But she had remembered it now, and she seemed shaken. He wanted desperately to calm her. To let her know that it was all alright. "No, Scully, you weren't feeling well, you just..." he looked in her wide, open eyes and actually forgot what he was saying. The voice in his head blared: "Look away, look away and find something else to focus on to. Anything. Just look away from her eyes!" He glanced down at her hand on his chest, that was soon joined by another. "Well, almost anything." the voice whimpered. "And you kissed me back, Mulder." He opened his mouth to protest but the words didn't make their way out. She lowered her head and tried to remember why she had kept her distance for all these years. Bureau policies? Office politics? Why did she force the distance between herself and this man, her partner and friend? "Scully, you're not thinking clearly." "Mulder, you're right." she took step back away from him and her socked foot graced a large piece of the glass. Automatically, she reversed, took a step closer to him - so close that he could smell the sweet ginger on her lips - and they froze. She stared up at him, her hands on his chest. She saw her fingers involuntarily trace across his chest, over his shoulders, up to his face. Mulder recognized the faint fear in her eyes. He stepped back. And she released him, too. They both stood there for a moment, not speaking, until the tension became unbearable. Mulder turned and headed for the door. "Mulder." she breathed, stopping him in his tracks, spinning him around to face her. "Scully..." She looked so small to him, standing there, surrounded by glass. Her eyes were wide and questioning. He wanted nothing more than to comfort her. Mulder needed to fix the situation, he knew, but the fear of making things any worse kept him still and silent. Scully stood her ground, but her eyes teared up. "Mulder, I'm sorry I upset you." His eyes blinked in confusion. "Upset?" "I'm sorry I kissed you." she whispered. Not wavering from his eye contact. "Scully, you don't have to apologize-" "It's just that things are happening around me." She knelt. "And I have so little control over them." The shards sparkled in the afternoon light as she carefully picked them up and cradled them in her palm. "I need control, Mulder." Each piece tinkled as it touched another. The tears finally rolled down her straight face. "I need control." Mulder's compassion for this woman became his primary focus. He dropped to the floor and knelt in front of her. "Scully, I'll go to the hospital, I'll find out what the lab results say. We'll find out what's wrong. We'll undo what ever they did-" "Mulder I know what's wrong. The tests won't find anything. There's nothing you can do." He knew she was right. These men were too good to let a public hospital lab catch them. For god's sake! They had SHOT her in the hospital and no one had caught them. "Scully, what can I do?" The frustration was there. She looked up to him and a smile grew on her pained face. "You could help me clean up this mess." And he did. ***** By the time the clock read 6:18 pm, Mulder and Scully were back on the loveseat. Only this time, they were sitting at opposite ends, and neither of them were watching Casablanca, which was now in its second hour. Scully had her focus out the window watching the rain slide down the pane. Mulder had his focus on Scully. In fact, he had spent the better part of the afternoon attempting to turn his mind to anything else. He had long since given up trying to find a way of getting out of the apartment and putting some distance between him and Scully. Every time he was about to say that he had forgotten about something important he had to get done, Scully would spoil it, and run an ivory finger across her bottom lip, or gently tuck her perfect hair behind her perfect ear. Suddenly her every feature had an adjective in front of it. Mulder knew this wasn't a good situation. Scully was his partner - his trusted partner. He needed that relationship. And now for some reason he couldn't explain he wanted more. Had nearly kissed her again...and very nearly worse. And for all Mulder's intelligence and maturity, he couldn't stop obsessing over the way she felt in his arms...and hands...and on his lips...she tasted so sweet. "Mulder." Scully sighed. "I can't stay in this house tomorrow." The gloom from outside had found its way in. "Okay." She looked at him with her best 'I'm serious' look. "I want to go back to work tomorrow." Mulder paused. "Okay." Her brow tensed. He was using too much effort to say nothing. She decided he was still worried about her, and he didn't want her to know. "Mulder, what's wrong?" "Wrong?" He feigned interest in the show on the screen. "Nothing." God - why did she have to say his name like that? Scully gave him a genuine smile and reached over and stroked his arm. "Mulder, I'm going to be all right. Stop acting so weird. We'll get back to work tomorrow and everything will fall back into place." His heart raced with her every touch. Her skin on his - stop it! He kept telling himself. STOP! Calm down. "Mulder?" Scully could see he wasn't listening to her. "Mulder?" What is wrong with him, she wondered. Was there something about the tests he wasn't telling her? The feel of her hand on his arm and her voice singing his name became too much for him, and he jumped up off the couch and muttered something about getting some air. Scully watched in bewilderment. He tried to explain about needing to do something important and an early start tomorrow, but all he could see was the distress on her face and it nearly broke his heart. He couldn't do this to her. He couldn't do this to himself. He began pacing the room, striding over to the window and then reversing his path, walked over to the bookcase. Scully had had enough. There was something he wasn't telling her and she intended to find out what it was. She placed herself directly in front of him. "Mulder, stop this!" "Scully..." but the words didn't come. "Dana..." without another breath he half leapt, half dove to her. He took her in his arms and pushed her towards the sofa. He caught himself with one arm on the back of the couch, the other arm locked around his partner and slowly lowered his body on top of her - waiting for any sign of resistance. None came. He stroked her hair back from her face and closed his eyes as he kissed her - gently at first, and then when she responded to his kiss with one of her own, he was more forceful, more insistent. The weight of him pressing her into the couch, his mouth on hers, his hand running down her thigh - it was all so overwhelming. She knew she had been the first to make the initial move, days before in the office, and then what ever that was earlier in the afternoon, maybe she wasn't entirely innocent there, either. Had she brought on this...this...what WAS this? All she knew was she was laying on the couch, Mulder on top of her, his hands in, well, compromising places; and, actually, come to think of it, hers were inching their way into the back of his jeans and under his boxers. The moment she recognized this thought, her hands recoiled back to the couch, obedient once again. Scully turned her head and tried to catch her breath. And Mulder stopped his rain of kisses to study her response. She breathed deeply and looked up at him. His mouth was opened slightly, inviting her in. "Mulder, " she gasped, and he immediately began to lift himself and back away in anticipation of her opposition. But instead, her hand lunged to his pant waist to stop him, and then ever so gently pulled him back on top of her. She didn't know who's fault this was. She just wanted his weight back, holding her. Mulder was hesitant. He wanted to be sure of her. And when he saw the certainty in her eyes and the gently smile across her lips, he kissed them again and relaxed down on to her warm body. As Scully felt him return, her legs parted and she wrapped one around his thigh. She pressed him to her and he responded with a gasp of pleasure. His hand made its way to her breast, and her hand went up to meet his. She held it for a moment, memorizing the sensation of his touch and then her fingers slid the buttons of her shirt out of the button holes. Mulder attentively watched her euphoric expression while he slid his fingers under the white satin of her bra and over the hard nipple underneath. Then a hard knock rapped at the door. Both Scully and Mulder froze. Several seconds passed. Another knock. Mrs. Scully opened the door and poked her head in. "Dana?" Mulder flew across the room and Scully scrambled to her feet. "Mom?" She nearly screamed the word out. Her heart was racing. Margaret's mouth gaped open at the picture that was laid before her. She watched as Mulder tried to straighten his clothing and hair and still look in control of the situation. "Dana." Margaret continued to stare at Mulder. "You left your door unlocked." Dana tried desperately to be comfortable by looking at everything in the room at once. "Yeah, well Mulder was here." She winced. Wrong response. Margaret's grin spread quickly as she turned to her daughter. "Yes, I can see that." She walked into the kitchen to set down the bulky shopping bag she was carrying, but couldn't resist a motherly: "Dana, dear, button up your blouse." Scully's eyes rolled in embarrassment and her fingers flew to her open shirt. Mulder twitched like a puppy at the vet. "Uh, I think I should be going now." he blurted while he was thinking: Why didn't I say that ten minutes ago? Dana breathed heavily. "Okay." Great. He was going to leave her there to deal with her mother's... Dana actually wasn't sure how mother would react. She looked up and saw her emptying the grocery bag and placing the objects in their proper place. Margaret paused only momentarily. "Fox. Come in here." Dana's eyes widened. Oh, no, she thought, Mom don't...please don't. Mulder responded to the summons. Maternal tones had always been able to hold him. "Here." Margaret place a head of lettuce in his hand. "Please clean this for me, and put it in a salad bowl, Fox. The rest of the salad vegetables are on the counter." Margaret stooped down and searched for a frying pan. With the lettuce in hand, Mulder looked to Scully. She shrugged and joined them in the kitchen. "Mom?" "Dana." Margaret found the pan. She stood and smiled at her daughter. "You're feeling better?" Scully paused. This was a loaded question. She had just been caught groping on the couch. That hadn't happened since...had it ever happened? Oh, God, and with Mulder. He - she looked over to him - he was washing lettuce. Margaret smiled. "I thought so." Dana shot a warning look at her mother. She didn't know exactly how to respond to this situation, but she knew Mom wasn't helping. Or was she? No, Mom DEFINITELY wasn't helping. The trouble was that all of it had happened so quickly. If it hadn't, she would have stopped it. Why hadn't he stopped it. She was developing a headache. "Dana, dear, please set the table. As soon as Fox finishes the salad, I'll have these vegetables sauteed and we can eat. Are you all right, dear? You're looking a little pale." Mulder's head shot around. "I'm fine, Mom." "Well," Margaret added with a smirk. "You'll feel even better after you've had a healthy dinner." ***** Dinner was...quiet. Scully found it almost painful. Mulder was definitely in pain. Mrs. Scully was having the time of her life. The thrill of knowing Dana WAS in love with Fox was enough to keep her singing for days. And if it had been under any other circumstances, she probably would have left them alone to sin all night long. But Dana had been very ill - in the hospital not two days before - and she needed rest and relaxation. Fox could wait. Dana's health was priority. As Fox cleared the dinner plates, and Margaret heated the ginger cookies and poured three glasses of milk, she innocently asked, "So how was your day?" Dana closed her eyes. "Fine, Mom." Fox grabbed two of the milk glasses and handed one to Dana as Margaret opened the microwave door and the smell of ginger hit him. The memory of sweet ginger on Dana's lips just under his flashed before him, and his fingers relaxed around the glass before her hand actually touched it. It shattered on the tiled floor. Margaret jumped and spun around to see Mulder backing away from Dana who sat frozen in the chair. "Fox?" Margaret was concerned. His eyes shot to Margaret. "I broke the glass." His face was pure shock, pale. "It's okay. Glasses break." This time Margaret's tone didn't stop the racing heart in his chest. But Dana's did. "Mulder." Her soft eyes reached out to him. "It's okay." And instantly he relaxed and smiled. "It's okay." IT'S OKAY! His heart soared. "IT'S OKAY!" Was he really laughing, or was that just his mind dancing? Dana laughed out load at his exuberance. He radiated. So did she. "Yes, it's okay." "Of course it's okay. It's just a glass. Here's a towel, Fox," Margaret said. "No." Dana smiled at her mother. "Mulder has to leave now." "YEAH!" He was grinning like an idiot. "I have to leave now." He backed out of the kitchen and pulled the door open. Mulder looked back at Scully. He knew at that moment that he loved her. That this wasn't a mistake. That somehow all of this would work. That together they would make it work. "Tomorrow?" Dana's smile was like a light. "Yep, tomorrow." And Mulder was out the door. Margaret's brow frowned. "Tomorrow? You're not going to work tomorrow?" Dana closed her eyes and rested her head against the back of the chair, smiling. "Yes, Mom, I am." ***** Scully was freshly bathed and tucked snugly into bed. Margaret sat next to her. Dana was into her thirties now, but her mother could still tuck her in and make her feel safe. Margaret reached over and gently stroked her daughter's hair. "I really wish you'd take another sick day, Dana and get some more rest." She knew Dana was a better doctor than she was patient. And she knew that Dana would never relax when she could be working. But she had to try anyway. "Oh, Mom." Dana protested. "I'll go stir crazy if I have to spend one more day in this apartment. Besides, I'm having to get creative in entertaining Mulder." The grin on her face set off a giggling chain reaction. And the remark let her mother know that the subject was no longer taboo. Dana was feeling better, there was no way around it. "Yes." Margaret said delicately, "I've been meaning to say something about that." Her face got very serious in an instant. "Dana, you know how much I like Fox." "Mulder." Dana playfully corrected. "And I've been watching the two of you for a while..." Dana's mood began to somber up. "And well, sweetheart, I can't really say this was a shock to me - " Dana laughed. "Mom, we kissed. You act like...like..." she was searching for the right image, and frustrated, added, "what do you mean you've been watching us for a while?" Margaret stood. "Just that." She knew she could only be protective with her daughter so far before Dana started to resist. "Good night, Dana." She kissed Dana on the forehead and switched off the light. From behind the safety of the dark Dana whispered, "Mom, thanks for coming in when you did...things got a little carried away. I'm not even sure - I mean - I didn't think he felt..." Margaret smiled a hidden smile. "He does. And so do you." Dana paused for a moment. Then she exhaled. "Good night, Mom." Margaret closed the door softly. In all the excitement, she had completely forgotten about Missy's phone call. ***** Learn to yield and be soft If you want to survive. Learn to bow And you will stand in your full height. Learn to empty yourself and be filled by the Tao ... the way a valley empties itself into a river. Use up all you are And then you can be made new. Learn to have nothing And you will have everything... - Tao Te Ching The next morning. Basement office. Scully's heels clicked on the tiled floor as she worked her way down to the basement of the Hoover building. It seemed like a year since she had last been here; so much had happened. And this reflection caught in her throat. She had no idea what to expect from Mulder when she went through the door and into her office. A kiss? God, she hoped not. And she reassured herself that Mulder surely didn't want that either. She loved her job, and he was obsessed with his. Neither of them was going to do anything stupid. Okay. She exhaled again as her hand turned the knob. "Scully, come in and look at this." Mulder had a collage of files open on his desk, a cup of hot coffee in his hand, and a grin on his face. "What is it?" She placed her briefcase down on her desk and leaned over his shoulder. He smelled so good. Like soap and clean laundry. Before them on the desk, were files and stacks of papers arranged in groups of three and four. "It's a lead, Scully." He pointed to a file on top. "These are the medical reports from Quantico. You weren't the only one who missed class time there. Although you definitely missed the most." She started flipping through the papers. "These are my medical files?" She was stunned. "How did you get these?" Mulder gave a dismissing gesture. "They have you down for everything from headaches and insomnia to pneumonia. You were there nearly every day." Scully's face dropped. "Mulder, I don't remember ever going to the infirmary." He studied her face. "Do you remember feeling sick? Headaches?" She picked up another group of pages. "You mean other than the one I'm developing now? I think. Vaguely. My entire trip is very vague. " She read through the reports of several of her class mates. None of them seemed odd or excessive. "Mulder, where's the lead?" "Here." he handed her a folder that was well worn. The report inside was labeled 'Kellogg, Frank, Special Agent: Official Statement.' Mulder stood back to watch her as he explained the story. "Apparently, Agent Kellogg felt that he needed to leave a statement - an official statement - on what he saw at Quantico over the last four weeks before he was accidentally shot by a customer wanting to purchase a rifle in a bait and tackle shop somewhere in Maine. The customer has since disappeared, the autopsy report arrived unsigned, and no explanation for Mr. Kellogg's presence in Maine has been given." Dana stood frozen with a blank expression as she muttered, "He was from Chicago." Mulder's ears perked up. "So you do remember him?" "Uh...yeah. He was one of the decent ones." Her eyes fell on the papers in her hands, but didn't follow the type. "He didn't try and hit on me, or make any sexist remarks." The implication that others had, indeed tried to hit on her and made remarks hit him from out of the blue. In Mulder's experience, he had rarely noticed anyone say a disparaging remark about Scully. He respected her judgment and her professionalism and had assumed that everyone else did, too. He could hear in her voice that he was way off base on this one. "When did he die?" Scully looked a little green. "Oh, he's not dead, Scully. He's in the Nan Travis Hospital in Jacksonville, Texas." "What?" Scully's eyes nearly fell out of her head. "What the hell is he doing in Texas?" Mulder's smirk and the twinkle in his eye told her everything she wanted to know. "Don't you think we should go and find out?" ***** The flight from D.C. to Dallas was uneventful for Scully and Mulder. Mulder got the window seat, and he slept against it with a pillow in the crook of his neck and a pair of headphones blaring Adam Ant. Scully glanced over to him and smiled. He was so unpretentious when he had his eyes closed and mouth open ever so slightly. Oh, his mouth, Scully thought, his pouty, soft, salty mouth. And then she breathed deeply, closed her eyes and focused back on the piles of files on her lap that Mulder had, no doubt, already committed to memory. The plane landed, and the two agents collected their luggage and transferred to a smaller "taxi" plane that held a maximum of six passengers. Scully was not pleased at the thought of spending forty-five minutes in this lifeboat of a plane. Mulder just smiled at her faintly green complexion. He didn't mind flying, and didn't understand her discomfort. When they arrived at the Cherokee County Airport in Jacksonville, Texas, both of the agent's hearts fell. There was a long strip of concrete which sufficed as the runway, and the rusty wooden barn was, Mulder guessed, the airplane hangar. Scully turned to Mulder, standing on the side of the runway as the plane that had brought them ascended back into the air. "So now what?" There were pine trees and red clayish dirt everywhere. Birds in the trees cooed. And that was about it. Mulder dropped his shoulder bag and cocked a half smile. "Don't worry, I'll ask directions in the control tower." He headed to the temporary building about a hundred feet away. He disappeared for a few minutes and by the time Scully wiped the small beads of sweat from her forehead, he was back and feeling proud of himself. "I've ordered a taxi. It'll be here in a few minutes." Scully just looked at him and then offered a supportive, "Yeah. Right!" No way was a taxi this lost. They were in the middle of nowhere. "Mulder, how big is this town? Will they even have a motel? Or are we going to buy a tent?" "They're big enough to have an airport." His smirk was spreading. He was really enjoying this. "Hey Scully, where's your sense of adventure? This is rural America. It's a dying culture." She was about to retort when the most horrible grinding sound pierced their ears, and a moment later their taxi - a 1979 wood paneled station wagon, complete with a rusted luggage rack and a Jesse Jackson for President bumper sticker. "Ah!" Mulder proclaimed. "Our love chariot has arrived." ***** The car rental agency, know in these parts as Cousin Kenneth-Earl's Friendly Car Place, was only a five minute drive, but the stench that permeated the taxi made the ride seem like an hour. Kenneth-Earl's was in a small strip mall that actually seemed to be relatively new. This was promising, Scully thought. Inside they met Iona-Louise, Kenneth-Earl's sister who explained that there was a run on rental cars in these parts and they only had Bessy-Mae, their powder blue baby left. "Ten dollars a day, and full the gas tank before you bring it back." Mulder tossed the keys to Scully. "Bessy-Mae is calling." And he was grinning...until he saw the car. She sat out in the alley behind the strip mall, pouting from lack of attention. Bessy-Mae was a powder blue 1973 Buick Skylark; a tank of a car - easily fifteen feet long and over six feet wide. Scully groaned. "Well, if we can't find a motel, we can sleep comfortably in the back seat -" Mulder's bright eyes flashed to her. "Along with a family of six." Mulder slipped into the drivers seat and found the seat belt. He smiled at Scully, who looked six years old in the huge couch of a front seat. She pointed gaping at the control panel between them. "What the hell is that?" Mulder's eyes lit up . "What's the matter, Scully, don't you remember 8-tracks?" They found the motel, Tradewinds, which didn't help Scully's dolor, and reserved two rooms. The exquisite turquoise interior and bright orange paper machete flowers made her heart sink low; she thought that surely when interior designers weren't accepted into hell, they were sent here. Mulder came into her room, and to Scully's utter despair, he was still enjoying himself. He playfully plopped himself down on her bed, which groaned and collapsed in a cloud of dust. She moaned. "Welcome to motel negative one." Mulder was afraid to breathe and have the mattress crumble underneath him. "Uh...we can switch beds if you want...or share..." Scully just rolled her eyes and heaved her heavy body up from the folding chair. "Come on, Mulder, let's just go to the hospital and get the hell out of here." She was truly frightened of what they might consider a hospital here. But they did have a job to do, and the sooner they did it, the sooner she could get back to civilization. ***** Nan Travis Memorial Hospital was in the heart of downtown Jacksonville. It was the largest, most modern building around - and next to the only stop light. "Hey," Mulder chimed in. "Things are looking up." Inside they talked with a receptionist who redefined the word English for them and directed them to "th' laaaast rume awn th' rayt." And there, in the last room on the right, was SpecialAgent Frank Kellogg. Scully recognized him immediately. He had a large white bandage around his head and covering his right ear and eye. Several machines were connected to his bruised arms and legs, and to the lay person, Mulder thought, the man looked like a science experience. Scully went to his bedside and spoke in low, nurturing tones. "Frank, it's Dana, from Quantico. Do you remember me?" He looked at her and he did hear her, Dana was sure of it, but he said nothing. His mouth was still. His breathing consistent. Scully bit her lip and found his chart on the inside of the door to his room. Mulder watched her as she read, page after page, putting the pieces together. Her eyes flickered with rage and hurt. He looked to the man in the bed who looked back at him. The door opened and in walked a man in a traditional white coat signifying his rank as doctor. He stopped short when he saw Scully with the file open and snatched it out of her hands. "Are you any relation to Mr. Kellogg?" He was demanding and indignant. Dana matched him stroke for stroke. "Are you the attending physician? What have you done to contact this man's family? How did he get here?" The doctor was adamant: "I will not answer these questions until I know who you are." Dana reached into her pocket and flipped out her ID. "I'm Special Agent Dana Scully, and I demand to know under what circumstances Agent Kellogg came to be here." Mulder stepped forward and offered a hand. "Hi. Agent Fox Mulder." The doctor blinked twice and took Mulder's hand. "Dr. Temple." ***** Once they were seated in Dr. Temple's office, he began to explain. "Mr. Kellogg was discovered about four days ago by old Dolly. She spends most of her day in and around the burned down Piggly Wiggly, and she found him along the back wall there. The police brought him to us. All we found was a drivers license. An attempt was made to get in touch with his family, but apparently they all died in a house fire about a week ago. There was no one who seemed to want the man. So we are letting him convalesce here." Scully's temper was flaring. "Why didn't you get in touch with the FBI?" Dr. Temple shrugged his bony shoulders. "The police made a missing person's report, I guess, but there wasn't anything on him to let us know he was FBI. How did you know he was here?" Scully turned and looked at Mulder. "Dr. Temple." Mulder changed the subject and began to rise. "Some one from the Bureau will be in touch with you. Agent Kellogg, was a government agent, and he's entitled to government pensions and health plans." Dr. Temple pursed his lips. "Whatever. The gunshot wounds he received will keep him mute for the rest of his life, so someone will have to take care of him for a while, until he adjusts." In the hallway Scully's earlier bad mood turned into fury. She made her way back to Agent Kellogg's room ranting, "They did this, Mulder, to keep him quiet. They killed his family and left him for dead here." Mulder winced. "Why would they go through all the trouble of dumping him here?" "Because they're animals!" She rounded the corner without slowing and burst into the hospital room like a bullet. She turned into doctor mode once she made it to Kellogg's side. "Frank, it's Dana Scully, again. We're going to get you out of here. Don't worry." He just looked up at her and blinked. Whatever recognition was there quickly faded. Dana squeezed his hand. "Frank, just try and get better." There was nothing else she could say to her friend. She couldn't promise him that everything would be okay, or that he'd be all right and not to worry. Feeling totally useless she left his room. And down the hall she saw Mulder on the phone. He hung up as she approached. "I called his partner out of the Chicago office, she's going to make arrangements to have him moved up there. It'll probably take two or three days, but that will give him some more recovery time." Scully hit the wall with the flat of her hand. "Damn it, Mulder!" Then she looked at him. "Thanks for calling." ***** End of part 1 ***** The Way Part 2 By KMNAHILL and MD1016 There wasn't much left of the Piggly Wiggly. The back wall was there, almost, but the front wall and ceiling were completely gone. It would have been difficult to judge how large the store had actually been if not for the cement slab, which was now scorched and littered with debris. Old Dolly was there (at least Mulder assumed it was her), as promised, pushing a rusted grocery cart around the slab. He estimated that she was roughly four and a half feet tall, probably in her early sixties, and filthy. Mulder approached her, and she saw him coming, but she didn't deviate from her course. "Are you Dolly?" Mulder asked. "Old Dolly," corrected the woman with a squawk. "I'm Special Agent Fox Mulder, and I'd like to ask you some questions about the man you found here." "Pass me the peas." She pointed to what Mulder saw as thin air, and Martha saw as the top shelf of the can goods section. "Where exactly did you find the man, Dolly?" "Buy the rump roast. Now get me the peas." "Mulder!" Scully called to him from the back wall. "Come look at this." He turned and saw Scully crouched and inspecting something. And he soon discovered what. There was a large, crusty, brown stain on the concrete. "Mulder, I think it's blood." "Right!" called Old Dolly. "Right next to the rump roasts. The Butcher left a mess for you." "Butcher?" Scully looked at the little woman. "Mulder do you think she saw anything?" He just shrugged. Then his eyes fell on a dozen or so half smoked cigarette butts not three feet from the blood. "Bet you ten bucks these are Morely's." "The Butcher did leave a mess." Scully's back stiffened when she saw the butts pushed with his shoe. Scully stood and walked to old Dolly who was selecting an imaginary box Nilla Wafers and placing them into her basket. "Did you see the Butcher?" Scully asked. Old Dolly was indignant. "Did I see the Butcher?" She scoffed as she checked the expiration date on a box of Oreos. "He's one of the terrorists!" "Terrorists?" Mulder's eyes narrowed. "What makes you think they were terrorists?" "The terrorists bombed the Piggly Wiggly!" Dolly exclaimed as if this was common knowledge. Scully gave a frustrated look to Mulder. "Even if she saw him, Mulder, she would never be able to identify him." Mulder nodded. "No, but now we know what happened. We just have to figure out why, and what did they do to you that was worth all of this." Scully's head dropped. This had been such a long disappointing, miserable day. The two agents turned and walked back to the car. Then Mulder glanced back to the woman pushing the squeaking cart. "Old Dolly," he called. "Here's your peas." And he tossed to her a make-believe can of peas that she somehow managed to drop. The delight in her eyes and large toothless grin warmed Mulder's heart. Some things, he thought, are so easy. ***** The storm that had been threatening to break all day long finally kept its promise. The Buick pulled into the Tradewinds parking lot and Mulder switched off the ignition; but neither of them moved. "There's a reason why this culture is dying." Mulder attempted to lighten the situation. "It's not dying fast enough." They sat there watching the rain stream down the windshield until Scully nearly whined. "Mulder I don't want to go in there." "The next nearest town is twenty minutes away. And the nurse at the hospital said they have nicer motels there. The town is bigger." "Let's go." In fifteen minutes they passed a small green sign that welcomed them to Tyler, and promised a population of 25,609. Scully's heart lightened. Three minutes later they pulled in to the Wilhite Inn. The Architecture was early American Colonial and it looked clean and well kept. This was the best thing they had seen all day. Mulder went in to get two rooms and came back with only one key. "There's some kind of Lodge meeting in town, and they only had one room, but they promised it's clean and nothing will break underneath us." Scully snatched the key from his hand. "Sounds perfect. You can sleep on the floor." ***** Scully's face smiled. She breathed a sigh of relief as she dropped her weary body carelessly on to the firm, clean, cool queen sized bed. There was a television, and a phone. Not that she was going to use either, but they were there. "Civilization." she exhaled again. Mulder dropped his shoulder strap bag just inside the door and gazed at Dana laid out on the bed. She was so beautiful. No, he thought, this was still business; business was off limits. He had to keep the two separate. Keep things organized in his head. The trouble was, and Mulder knew this, he was just so bad at organization. He did follow her lead, however, stretching out on the bed next to her. The long day was finally over and dealing with the trip, Scully's miserable mood and everything else had taken a hell of a lot of effort. He could feel the muscles in his back relax as his breathing slowed. His eyes closed naturally and he sensed his right arm had brushed up against Scully's warm side. He hadn't realized how tired he really was. He felt as if he could stay in this position forever. "Mulder. " She rolled towards him. "This bed is big enough. You don't have to sleep on the floor. Mulder?" He couldn't already be asleep. She touched his arm and his eyelids fluttered briefly and then they relaxed again. "No Mulder, don't fall asleep like this!" She shook his shoulder. "Mulder wake up!" "What?" he gasped, but didn't stir much. "Mulder, put your head at the head of the bed. Mulder! Don't fall asleep on top of the covers. Come on." Helping him roll into place, she pulled out the blankets from underneath him . She reached across him to grab his pillow before he became immovable and he grabbed her left wrist. The sudden move startled her. "Agent Scully, you smell so good. How can you smell that good after the day..." "Do you want your pillow, Mulder?" His left arm grabbed her hip and pulled her on top of him. "Absolutely." Scully didn't struggle to free herself, and she didn't encourage his flirtatious passes, either. His eyes were closed. She had seen the effort it had taken him to shift her weight on to him. She gently slid her right hand around the back of his head and cradled it as she lifted it up just enough to slide the downy pillow underneath. "Oh, Scully..." he was barely audible now and his arms relaxed on top of her. Poor Mulder, she thought, all tired out. Dana laid her head on his chest and relaxed into the steady rise and fall of his breath, the warmth of his body, and the occasional muscle jerk that kept him from complete unconsciousness. This kind of contentment she hadn't felt in years...if ever. It was a sensation she tried to memorize, but her eyes were too heavy to really think any more. And just before she fell asleep, she rolled off of him, and into the cold sheets at his side. She covered the two of them up, careful that his feet weren't poking out, and then she, too, drifted off. ***** When Dana finally woke up she was lying on her right side in the fetal position. Mulder's right arm supported her head and he was curled around her; his left arm hugged her snuggly to him. It took her a long moment to come to the realization that all was still completely innocent. But the fact that the two of them were still in their clothes from the day before reassured her. Blue light broke through the crack in the drapes, but Dana couldn't judge the time by this. And the small hotel clock was on the nightstand that her back was to. She could feel his warm breath on her bare neck. She didn't want to move, if she woke Mulder the moment might end. Slowly, Dana twisted her arm to read her watch. Mulder responded instantly. The sound began deep in is middle, and Dana felt it before she heard it. "No." She froze. She waited a moment, but nothing happened. She breathed deeply - and no response. So she tried again to check the time. "Don't." She felt the vibrations with her back. He didn't want her to move, Dana thought. Was he sick? She wished she could see his face. "Stop!" he bolted up abruptly. Dana shrieked at his outburst. Her scream broke the hold of the nightmare. Now he was surrounded only by a darkened motel room and Dana's alarmed expression. It took at least a minute for the two of them to get their breath back. When they did Mulder, embarrassed, said meekly, "I'm sorry I woke you." Dana smiled. The right side of his perfect hair was flat against his head. "You didn't. Actually, I think I woke you." "Oh." Mulder fell back in to the pillow. "Then thank you." He ran his fingers through his hair. He knew he didn't look particularly dashing at the moment, and he hoped Dana didn't notice. He looked over at her; she was staring at him. "Bad dreams?" It's probably the bed, she thought, he's not used to a bed. "Come here." He held out a hand to her. Dana hesitated, not sure what he was intending. But then she chided herself, this is Mulder. She crawled to him and nestled in next to his right side. "You want to talk about your dream?" He smiled at the top of her head. "No." She was so warm next to him. And her hair still smelt faintly of berries. Mulder swallowed hard, and forced himself to fight the odd little urges that were taunting his thoughts. "We should try and take the three o'clock fight out of here." She looked at him quizzically but then nodded. "What next?" Scully asked dryly, "We don't have any new leads." She was lying with the weight of her head on his shoulder. Her make-up had long since faded and the little freckles that speckled her face were smiling up at him. She looked fresh. Leads...how could he go out and look for leads when she was here, and safe, and in his arms? Mulder didn't care about leads. He knew he should, but he didn't. Mulder caressed her shoulder and arm. Leads. He forced himself to concentrate. Those bastards did something to Scully and he would find out who and why. And there and then he promised himself, she wouldn't go through that again. Scully gently shook him back from his thoughts. "Mulder?" He gazed down at the beautiful woman with blue-blue eyes. Not a trace of the illness that put her in the hospital not a week before was left. And he was going to make damn sure it didn't happen again. "I don't know," he confessed. He felt guilty for not bringing her torturers to justice. He pulled her even closer to him, wanting desperately to shield her from the world and keep his vow. Scully's natural response was to slide her arm across his middle. His heart shot into his throat. Mulder tried to swallow it down, but her voice whispered his name and he nearly choked. Without thinking, he leaped out of the bed and away from her touch. She sat up wide eyed. The frown on her face was questioning. Mulder knew that wasn't the smoothest move he could have made. And he tried to cover. "Uh...thought I saw something out the window." His attempt was so transparent. Scully's mouth dropped open. She was absolutely shocked. "Mulder..." she said slowly. She wasn't sure why he had startled so abruptly, but she had an idea. And the more she considered this idea, the more a frown formed on her face. This seemed remarkably similar to what happened in her apartment just a few nights before. Her mother had interrupted them then. Scully's eyes dropped. She screamed in her head: "Right. Here, mom couldn't interrupt. Got it, Mulder. Loud and clear." She rolled off the bed and headed into the bathroom. Mulder watched her and his heart dropped. "Scully." he wanted to kiss her. "Scully, I'm going for a jog." She looked at herself in the mirror. Then she closed her eyes. "Have a good time." ***** Six Days Later Basement Office of Fox Mulder and Dana Scully. It had been a long day, and then a longer flight back to D.C.. But nothing could compare to what the next five days had become, in Mulder's mind; the week that refused to end. It was nearly eleven in the morning, and Scully still hadn't shown up for work. Mulder was worried. He had tried calling her home, and the machine picked up. When he tried to contact her by cellular phone, it rang not five feet away from him, tucked forgotten in the drawer of her desk. Slamming his fist on the desk, he hissed, "Damn it, Dana." "What?" Dana swept in the room, tossed her satchel on her desk, and picked up the mail that was bound neatly by a rubber band. "Cursing my name, Mulder? It's not even noon yet." She had a smirk on her face. "Where the hell have you been, Scully?" She looked up at him, stating: "Doctor's appointment." Then she continued filing through her mail. "Oh." Mulder had forgotten. The first set of lab tests had come back completely normal, just as Scully had said they would. The doctors had insisted on another set, and Dana was sure the results would be the same. "How did it go?" Mulder watched her as she hesitated briefly and kept her eyes on the form letter in her hands. "Oh, fine." ***** Ten Hours Later. Mulder sat hunched over his desk in the semi-dark of the basement office. Scully was at her desk, her back to him. He was painfully aware of her exhale as she turned nearly every page in the "official" report she had been able to get on Agent Kellogg. In fact, she had read the damn thing five times. The case was at a stand still, and nothing new or pressing had been assigned in the last week or so. She knew there were mountains of files and paperwork that needed to be filled out and placed into storage where they would be forgotten the moment the drawer closed. But it seemed pointless to try and tackle it all. Let Mulder do it, she thought. Or better yet, let them stay in the six foot stack against the wall. They were just as useful there as anywhere else. Dana sighed again and laid her head down on her desk. Mulder's eyes frowned. He saw how tired she was. Scully had not been herself these last couple of days. Hell, not since they got back from Texas. Before Texas, really. He swallowed a lump of guilt that was building in his throat. Normally he'd make a crack about her keeping too many late nights with those gentlemen callers, and she would respond in kind with a weary smile and a light "huh." But this was a luxury that he had traded for that kiss with her. Well, okay, several kisses. But the one in particular, on the couch that had almost become more... . "Scully, you can call it a night if you want. There's not much more we can do here anyway. I'm going to meet with the Lone Gunmen tomorrow, see if they've been able to dig anything up." She pushed away from her desk and collected her coat, leaving papers and briefcase where they lie. "Send Frohike my love." and with that she was out the door. A subconscious hand went to Mulder's heart. This was his fault, he thought to himself. It was because of him, and his lack of restraint that Scully was miserable. He should have dismissed what happened in the kitchen that day as a side-effect of Dana's recent illness. He should have left her apartment all together and saved her from this depression. How could he make this better? Things had to get back to normal. He needed Scully back, and once she was, he knew, this case would fall into place; they would find out who was behind all of the testing they'd done on her. He couldn't take back the kiss, he reasoned, but they had to talk this through. Scully was an intelligent, emotionally sound woman...most of the time. She could rationalize this. They could fix whatever it was that was broken. He decided to go to her. ***** Scully, once home, peeled off her shoes, hose and skirt as she made her way to the kitchen and found the Ben and Jerry's New York Super Chocolate Chunk in the freezer. The blouse hit the floor as the spoon scooped up a mouthful of the ice cream. The bra was tossed across the room as she flopped down on to the sofa. Scully closed her eyes and relaxed into the softness of the afghan she pulled over her. The cold in her hands comforted her, for some unknown reason, and she pressed it to her face. Her eyes hurt. Her neck hurt. Even her brain was achy. The knock at the door didn't even cause her to blink. She continued to lick the cold from the spoon. The door bell rang. Twice. Then Mulder yelled: "Scully! It's me! Are you home?" "Yep," she said to herself as she scraped another curl from the pint. "Scully? Scully? Are you okay?" Mulder was knocking again, and becoming frantic with worry. "I'm fine," she exhaled. She knew he couldn't hear her, and the tension in his voice seemed on the verge of hysteria. Guilt crept in the snug little world she had made. She closed her eyes and called out, loud enough for him to hear: "I'm fine Mulder. Go home." "Scully! Let me in!" He was trying the locked door repeatedly, hoping that the next time it would open magically. "Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin." She sat up and put the ice cream down on the coffee table. "Mulder, I'm tired. Go home." "No, Scully, we need to talk. Please..." And it was the please that pulled her eyes to the door. His tormented 'please'. Her heart squeezed in her chest when she heard it. Wrapped in the afghan, she opened the door to him, and he stood with a relieved expression when he saw she was in one piece. "Do we have to talk now, Mulder?" Her tone was completely neutral. He hated when she was like this. It was so difficult to judge what to do next. He decided to go for it, but still put the ball in her court. "Don't you think we should?" Nice, safe response. "No." Mulder blinked. He hadn't expected that. He shifted feet. "Well..." Her body was blocking any entrance into the apartment - she didn't want him in there. And her body, he noted was void of any clothing under the blanket she had around her. "Well...I do." Oh, he thought, good response. That was brilliant. Say something else, Shakespeare, and dazzle your way in. She stood there for a moment waiting for more to his retort. But nothing else came. She gave him a questioning look. His remained open and fixed on her. Okay, she thought, he thinks we should talk. She left the door and made her way back to the couch. "So talk." Mulder closed the door behind him and saw the discarded heels and hose like a trail in to the kitchen. His eyes widened. Dana's immaculate house messy? Clothes on the floor? Was that her bra on the lamp? Definite fire hazard. He casually lifted it from the shade and it dropped to the floor. Then he sat next to her on the couch. "Dana, you seem a little down." "I'm tired." Her answer was not apologetic, nor was it condemning. "Yeah, well, you've been like this for days." He couldn't look at her, but he knew her eyes were out the window again. "And I think this is my fault. And I need to fix it. I'm sorry about what I did...the other night...when you were still sick. I've been kicking myself over and over. I'm sorry it ever happened." Tears welled up in her eyes, but her face remained stone-still. "I need you back, Dana. It'll never happen again. I have only the utmost respect for you...but you know that." Mulder played with his hands, attempting to refocus on just what it was he was trying to say. He had considered planning it all out ahead of time, but figured she would have known he had done it, so the importance of what he wanted to say would be lost. He never wanted her to think he was just going through the ropes for her benefit. "Are you saying, " she said slowly, forcing her voice to remain completely even as the water from her eyes over flowed and cascaded down her face. "that you want to forget it, and pretend that it never happened?" No! That's not what he wanted! Mulder closed his eyes. But he guessed that was, indeed, what he was saying. "Yes." "I'll be better tomorrow, Mulder." Mulder nodded. They hadn't talked as much as he had hoped, but she had said what he hoped she would say. Maybe everything would fall into place tomorrow. "I'll let you get some sleep." He rose from the couch and left. Scully watched him leave, and as the door shut behind him she realized he hadn't the slightest idea that she was crying. ***** The next day, by 11:45 am, Mulder had been to work, spent most of the morning listening to Scully's phone line ring, driven by her apartment - where there was no sign of her - and made it back to Skinner's office just as he was going out for lunch. "Sir," Mulder addressed the AD. "May I have a word with you?" The look in Mulder's eye was enough to cause Skinner to turn on his heel and lead the way back into the office. He took a seat behind his desk. "Agent Mulder, what seems to be the-" "Scully's missing. She's not at home, she's not answering her phone-" Skinner put up a hand to stop Mulder before he went into complete hysterics. "She's not missing, Mulder, she's on vacation." He motioned for the agent to have a seat, which was completely ignored. "Why didn't she tell me? Is this another Quantico? What are they doing to her?" Mulder was about to loose control. Skinner stood and tried in his calmest tone. "Agent Mulder, you are out of line. Agent Scully is, I believe, taking some vacation days to completely recover from her ordeal..." he looked down at the paper and read directly from her handwriting: "... and the recent investigation in Texas." Skinner looked back at Mulder who was staring at the sheet on his desk. "I believe she's staying with her mother." Mulder nodded. He slowly turned and began to leave the room. "Agent Mulder, stay away from Scully for a while. Let her rest. That's an order!" "Order, my ass," Mulder grumbled under his breath as he slammed the door. "she's my goddamn partner." ***** Showing up on Margaret's doorstep, unannounced made Mulder feel like an intruder. But when she answered the door she smiled sweetly and gave him a friendly hello. She wasn't surprised in the least that he was here, although it was nearly two p.m., and she wondered what had taken him so long. "I'd like to talk to Dana," he said sheepishly as he tried to enter the house. She stated simply: "No." He stared at the woman, dumbfound. He stammered, "I need to see her....I need to know she's all right..." Margaret nodded. "I know, Fox, but she's not all right. She's exhausted. You've got to give her some time." Mulder could see that although she was being gentle with him, she wasn't going to give an inch. His eyes grew wide with panic. He couldn't just leave her. Sure, he thought, she'll be safe enough, but it would be like he was abandoning her. She needed him now. He needed her. He was her best friend. Surely Mrs. Scully understood the necessity of friends during the healing process. Margaret pursed her lips. "She's sleeping out back. Come with me." She lead the way into the kitchen and through the bay window she pointed to Dana dozing in a rope hammock, a straw hat shading her eyes. "She's as pale as a ghost, the sun will be good for her." Fox just stood there staring at the small, limp woman rocking gently in the breeze. "The Indian Summer was sent just for her, I think." Margaret sensed his shoulders relax at the sight of her daughter. Years of mothering had taught her when to back off and let things take their course, and instinctively she knew this was one of those times. But after a moment, she knew she wouldn't be able to just sit idly and watch these two crumble. "Fox." she felt her way in slowly. "the other night...when I walked in..." Mulder's eyes flashed to Mrs. Sully and then back to Dana through the glass. "Dana said you talked and decided to forget that it happened." She was quiet and serious. Mulder took a long moment. Then he nodded. "I was to blame, I should have -" "Blame?" Mrs. Scully's blue eyes rounded. "Fox Mulder, when two adults have strong feeling for one another, and they act on those emotions, there's no one to blame." Her voice was soothing, but she was speaking Greek to him. "I kissed her and it ruined everything." "Did it? " Margaret was careful with her word choice. "Yes, she wishes it had never happened. She withdrew from me. I tried to talk to her last night and she.." he breathed with the strain of getting the sentence out, "...she...I...she didn't want to open the door to me. She didn't want to let me in." He looked out at Dana, she was so peaceful out there, on the other side of the glass, away from him. He turned away and it the counter with the flat of his hand. "I'm losing her." Margaret gave him a moment to breath and then asked: "When she did let you in, what did you talk about? Fox what did you tell her?" He could tell by the way she phrase the question that she already knew the answer. He swallowed. "I apologized." A nod came from the woman to his right. "Don't you think, Fox, that it's possible that Dana was trying to shut out the apology?" Mulder turned to her, completely confuse. "Shut out the ... what does that mean?" "It means, Fox," Margaret said in exaggerated movements. "that she's in love with you, and she thinks you regret it. She thinks you...want to forget it." Her eyes pierced through the back of his head. And for all her mothering experience, her finely honed skills, Margaret couldn't resist the last question. "Don't you think that maybe she was trying to protect herself from that kind of rejection?" Mulder squeezed his eyes shut. God! It made such sense! And the morning in Texas...oh, God! He cursed his idiocy, his blind insecurity, and all of his other million faults. He turn back to Scully. Her hair blazed in the sunlight. A fragile hand hung limp over the side of the hammock. She was so beautifully dainty, he thought to himself, and he smiled. He'd never considered Dana dainty before. "She loves me?" This was good. Very good. He would go out there and straighten this all out with three little words. Mulder made a move for the back door, but Margaret caught his arm. "Fox, don't." He turned to her. "She's sleeping. Please, let her rest. I was telling the truth when I said she's not well. She does need time." He nodded. And after a momentary glance at Dana, he turned and headed out the front door. "Okay," he called with a spring in his voice, "I'll be back for dinner." ****** Byers and Langly huddled in the light of the computer screen. Neither of them had been able to make much head way into any government activities concerning Quantico, Agent Kellogg, or anything else on the list that Mulder had faxed them. Frohike, with his rounded face, eyes Mulder closely. "So where's your better half, Mulder?" Mulder sat up and flashed him a grin. "She sends her love." "No kidding." Frohike chirped, "Cool." Langly swiveled to face Mulder. "This is going to take a while. I've never seen such care taken by the government to safeguard documents or files. IF they're there - and that's a big if - they're protected by several levels of security." Mulder's interest was piqued. "What do you mean 'if' ?" Buyers piped up. "If I was this desperate to keep things a secret, the last thing I'd do would be to make a hard copy of it for any hacker to happen across." Frohike nodded in understanding. "We're looking in the wrong place." Mulder's frustration was growing, "So where the hell is the right place?" The I-don't-know look from Frohike was not what he wanted to see. "If it's not in hard copy somewhere," Langly reasoned, "then we're not dealing with our government. They need the self glorification of print." Byers laughed, "Yeah, Mulder, don't worry. We'll find you something. It just may take some time." "Okay, " Mulder crossed the room and collected his coat, "You boys have a week." ****** Scully woke from her afternoon nap in the hammock feeling better than she had in months. The sun as setting behind the old oak, and the cool air forced her to finally stir from the comfortable position. She stretched her arms and legs, rolled on to her feet, and sauntered back into the house. Back yards were definitely something she missed about living in an apartment. Margaret sat, with her feet tucked beneath her, in the comfy chair reading a novel. She had placed a plate of ginger bread cookies on the coffee table for when Dana woke from her nap. She smiled at her groggy daughter. "Hey, Mom, " Dana greeted her, "what'cha reading?" Margaret flashed her the cover. "You Can Heal Yourself by Louise Hay." She scrunched up her nose at her daughter, "It's brainwashing." Then she nodded, knowingly, "Melissa recommended it to me after your father passed away." With a playful toss, Margaret sent the book across the room and patted the sofa next to her. "Join me?" Dana relaxed into the couch next to her mother. She knew her mom had stayed home all day, and she was going to make sure this wasn't a common practice. After all, she had a life, Dana reasoned, even if I don't. "You know, Mom, you're not under house arrest. I'm just going to be sleeping a lot, so you don't have to be here the whole time for my sake." "Oh, I'm going out to the movies this evening with Bill, Jr. and the boys." Margaret picked a stray thread from her cut-off jeans. "But, Fox is coming for dinner." Dana held her breath. She searched her mother's eyes for an explanation. "You invited him." One hand went to the pillow behind her and she pulled it to her chest. "No," Margaret corrected, "I did not. But he did come by earlier today, and I did talk with him." Dana's eyes nearly popped out of her horrified face. In trying to recover she nonchalantly brushed a clump of hair behind one ear. "Oh. What did you talk with him about?" Margaret read her reaction with the clarity of experience. Dana was tense again. Her shoulders were nearly up to her ears and her knuckles were white from grasping the pillow. Even her breathing was forced now. So much for the relaxation, Margaret thought, she'll have to go to the moon to find some peace. "I told him to let you sleep." Dana wriggled under the throw pillow. "What did he want?" "He was worried," She looked at her beautiful daughter curled like a pill-bug. "So he's coming here for dinner to see that you're feeling better." "Did you tell him what we talked about last night?" Margaret's lip bitten silence told her just how much she had told him. Dana pressed a hand to her tight forehead. "Mom, you understand that he's my partner and I have to work with him. You understand that when my vacation days are up, I have to face him again." Her headache was coming back. Margaret frowned. Her better judgment had told her not to get involved, and she had ignored it. She silently cursed herself as the doorbell sounded a loud DING-DONG! "That'll be Bill, Jr." Margaret stood and slid on her canvas shoes. "I cooked a lasagna and made a salad, they're in the fridge." She kissed her daughter on the head and opened the front door. Before she was able to slip out, Dana shrieked, "Mom! You're leaving?" Margaret swung a shoulder bag from the foyer over her head, "I'm staying with my grandchildren tonight. After all, I'm not under house arrest." The grin on her face was a mixture of devilish-delight and a worried-protective mother. But she shut the door behind her. Dana collapsed on the sofa, moaning: "Mom...." ****** The knock on the door startled Dana from the light reverie of pre-sleep. She was still on the couch, but the room had gotten considerably darker since her mother left. Oh, God, she thought, that's Mulder. She briefly considered pretending she wasn't there. But Mulder called out. "Scully?" She sighed and stood. "I'm coming." She could see his silhouette through the smoked glass of the front door. She knew he could she her, too. Unconsciously, she paused. He was there, on the other side of the glass. What was she going to say to him? Why was she scared? This was Mulder. Not someone she should be afraid of. No, she told herself, no. He's my partner. This will be fine. She passed a lamp and turned it on. When she opened the door, Mulder smiled down at her. He saw that Dana was rested and the color had returned to her face. She looked beautiful in the soft blue tee-shirt that fell carelessly over her jeans. "You're feeling better." He had intended it to be a question, but she looked so healthy. "I'm feeling fine, Mulder." She felt his stare and quickly turned back in to the living room. "I'm sorry I didn't call to let you know I was taking some vacation days - I know I should have..." She waited for him to cut her off - tell her it was all right. But he didn't. He stood just inside the living room, watching her pace the floor. "It's just that it was early when I put in the request this morning-" "Four am." Mulder offered. She looked to him, "Yeah, well," but she couldn't think of anything else to say. He was hovering over there across the room, studying her. She thought for a moment that he looked almost scared, but when he finally took a few steps towards her, she saw only warmth in his eyes. And it caused her heart to race. Stop, Dana, she hissed in her mind, just stop it. "Mom has gone out," Dana babbled, "she'll be right back." Why had she said that? She blinked, startled by the involuntary way her mouth spilled open and spouted lies. She could feel her breathing tighten and her face flooding with warmth. Mulder stepped even closer to her now, his lips nearly touching her, but not. She could feel his breath on her face. The heat from his body was like a blanket between them. She gave him a questioning look. This was not the way to 'just forget what had happened'. He reached out to touch her and her breath caught in her throat. With his long fingers, he cupped her head in his hands and whispered the words that made Dana's heart stop. "I love you." Her knees buckled and she caught herself against his strong arms. He slipped his hands around her waist and pulled her to him. She lost herself in the warmth of his eyes as he studied her face. She couldn't believe she had heard him correctly. Not after the other night. He had wanted to forget, he said .... She caught herself. He had wanted to talk, had been insistent on talking with her. She was the one who was silent and uncommunicative. She was so sure of what he was going to say that she hadn't really given him a chance. Could he really mean it? Could he...? All thought of what he could or couldn't do fled as he brought his lips to hers. They had kissed before but this one was totally outside of their experience. He started the kiss tenderly as if she would melt away from him as had so many others in his life. But she wasn't leaving him. She was real and solid beneath his touch. The kiss deepened as had their trust in one another. She moved her body closer to his and it still wasn't enough. He gently pried her lips apart and tasted of her sweet mouth. As his tongue entered her, it was as if he had finally pieced her soul and they were joined. All of his love was found in that kiss. It ended all their questions, all of their doubts. He finally pulled away from her slightly and gazed at her face. He kept a firm hold on her which was as well, Dana thought, or she might have fallen, she was so overwhelmed by her feelings. She sighed and opened her eyes. Fox caught his breath. Her eyes had never shone so brightly, had never seemed so blue. "I love you," he repeated. Having said it once, it seemed only appropriate to say it as often as possible. Dana smiled and her whole face was lit by it. Hell, Mulder thought, the whole room is lit by it. He cupped her face again with one hand, his other arm still firmly holding her waist, and forced her head up. "Never look away, Scully. We've been doing that too long with each other. We're here and we love each other and we need to talk about it. We need to be honest about it." She smiled, a mischievous gleam coming into her eyes. "You want to talk about it? Now?" "No, not right now," he answered with his own grin. He moved to kiss her again. At some point they had moved to the couch although neither one could remember doing so. Mulder had lost his jacket and tie and most of the buttons of his shirt were open. Dana's hair was mussed and her tee shirt was askew. Her jeans were also undone. They were lying together with Dana sprawled over Mulder's long form. Both were breathing heavily. "Dana, when did you say your mother was coming home?" Memories of a previous session on a couch were deeply engraved in Mulder's mind and he had no wish for a repeat encounter. "Um, she's not." Dana turned a darker shade of red. She was already rather flushed from their exertions. "But you said...," Mulder stopped as he saw her expression. "Dr. Scully, you lied to me." "Well, yes, I suppose you could look at it in that manner. I suppose." She tried to scrambled to a more upright position but Fox kept his hands wrapped around her, pinning her to his chest. "I will need to think of a suitable punishment for this, you understand," he said lowering his voice suggestively. She laughed and realized that it had been too long since she had done so. The thought was sobering. He caught her change of mood instantly. "Dana?" "Fox, I just.... I don't know. This all feels so right. This is the way it suppose to be but... there are so many things that will work against us. I..." She didn't finish the thought as Mulder brought his lips hard against hers to silence the rest of the sentence. "Not tonight, Scully. Not tonight. We have something else to do." He gently pushed her over to the couch as he slipped out beneath her and stood up. He held out his hand, one question burning in his eyes. She nodded her answer as she took his hand. Without another word she led him to the stairs and the bedroom beyond. ***** Mulder woke first. Scully had somehow fallen asleep face up, perpendicular across his body, and her heavy, sleeping head had cut off most of the circulation in his right arm. His wince gradually grew into a smile once he realized that his left arm was free and still responding to his commands. He gently ran his finger tips across her flat tummy. She didn't stir, but her skin puckered into goose flesh. He traced his fingers up her body and over her nipple, and it instantly became firm and solid. A wave of delight swam through him. He adored the knowledge that his touch had such a distinct effect on her. It was still unreal that she was even here with him; that they had spent the night together making love. And yet, here she was. Dana inhaled deeply and slid to Mulder's side. The movement caused sharp needles to shoot through his arm. He tried in vain to stifle the yelp that erupted from his throat. Scully jumped up instantly. "What?" she demanded. "My arm." He moaned as the blood rushed through his veins and created a twisting throb in his dead limb. "I can't move my arm." A hand shot to her lips as she realized the cause for his 'discomfort'. "Sorry," she giggled. Then, with her small, sensitive hands, she massaged the blood back into place. "Ah, Doctor Scully to the rescue." He was smiling again. She felt a flutter in the pit of her stomach. His smile. His beautiful smile. She leaned forward and let her breasts brush against his chest as she kissed him again. She felt his hands wrap around her hips and pull her on top of him. Briefly she pulled back and looked at him below her. He was looking up at her with such love. Watching her look at him. And she knew that she loved him. Smoothing back the hair from his face, she whispered, "Fox...I...love you." And then she lowered her hungry body on top of his, and they made love till well past noon. ***** When the clock on the microwave read 12:47, Mulder had finished rummaging through the fridge and place the lasagna that was meant for last night in to be nuked. He was starving. The shower (after his morning's work out) had left him feeling euphoric, and he knew that once Dana got out, she'd need nourishment as well. He hummed as he plugged in ten minutes and pressed start button and the microwave came alive with a hum of its own. It really is no surprise that he didn't heard the key in the lock, or the front door open, or even Margaret setting down her bag and keys in the foyer. But her gasp as she stood in the archway of the kitchen made him spin around. Mulder stood, towel around his waist, hair dripping down his chest and back, in total shock. It had simply not occurred to him that Margaret would be coming home - that this was HER home. He opened his mouth and "Aaahh..." spilled out. Margaret, wide-eyed, nodded, "I'll come back later." And she turned to see Dana traipsing down the stairs, still wet from her shower, wrapped in a towel matching Mulder's. "Mom!" Dana jumped. "Oh, God." Margaret's eyes nearly fell out of her head. She had left the two of them alone, hoping they would work out their feelings. That way Dana could get back to getting healthy again. She had even hoped that they would kiss a little and maybe Mulder would tuck her daughter snugly in to bed, and tell her that it would all be fine. But the sight of her naked daughter before her caused a pain in her chest. "I'll come back later." ***** If a ruler behaves as if he's invented the world He will do no good at all. The earth is a sacred vessel - and it cannot be owned or improved. If you try to possess it, you will destroy it: If you try to hold it - you will lose it. Some are leaders, then, and others follow. Some drift like the wind, and others drive hard. Some are thick-skinned, and others have no armour; And some are the destroyers, and others they destroy. - Tao Te Ching They rode back to Scully's apartment in a companionable silence, only occasionally breaking out into fits of giggles as they remembered the look on Margaret Scully's face when she came home that morning. It was a toss up as to whom was the most embarrassed. Dana had recovered first and sent a red-faced Mulder upstairs to dress while she talked to her mother. "Mom, um, I guess I don't have to tell you that Mulder and I have, um, worked out our problems." she said self-consciously, not sure what her mother's reaction was going to be. "Dana, you're a grown woman and you know I like Fox. I want you to be happy, but are you sure this is the right time for you? You've been through so much. Are you sure this isn't just, I don't know, maybe, just a reaction to that?" "No, Mom. It's more than a 'reaction'," she smiled. "We've been fighting our feelings for each other for some time. I don't think there will ever be a right time for us. We decided that the right time has to be now, that's all we can count on. And I am happy, Mom. He makes me so happy." Margaret's response was to reach out and fold her youngest daughter in a fierce hug. "I'm so glad for you Dana. So glad. Now I'm going to get out of here for awhile and let you two have some privacy. When should I come back?" "Mom, you're right about our needing privacy. We're going to have some things to sort out about this relationship. I think I better go back to my place." She raised a hand to ward off her mother's objections. "Mulder will be with me. I'll be fine. And I promise not to over do it." Dana blushed at her mother's raised eyebrows then laughed when she realized how her last statement had sounded. Now that they had reached her apartment, Dana wasn't sure what to do next. Her hand trembled slightly as she went to insert the key into the lock. With a knowing look, Mulder gently brushed her hands away and turned the key, stepping aside to let her enter first. She had taken a few paces into the room when she heard him shut the door behind them. If only he would say something, she thought. Mulder stood behind her. He knew she was feeling a little lost. So was he. They were going to have to find out what changes were going to result now that they had entered this new stage of their relationship. He took two steps to reach her and then enclosed her in his arms to comfort and be comforted. Neither were sure how long they stood there embraced against the rest of the world but when they parted they felt more confident. "I'll go make us some coffee. Why don't you put my bag in the bedroom?" she said as she headed for the kitchen. "Bossy, already!" he replied with his usual grin. They were seated spoon fashion on the couch, Scully nestled in Mulder's arms as they watched the sunset from the living room window. "Mulder, I need to know that this is OK with you. It happened so fast, I just need to be sure." Dana's voice was a whisper. She wasn't used to sharing her needs, not even with her partner but they had promised each other that they would make an effort to be more honest with each other in this area. "Dana, I love you. I've loved you for a long time now. I'm OK," he finished simply. He guessed what her question had cost her. She turned herself in his arms to stare into his face. Suddenly, she smiled. "I'm OK, too, Mulder." She kissed him hard on the lips and felt his arms tighten around her. She let out a small gasp as his hand cupped her breast, his thumb lightly caressing her nipple. "Um, Scully?" he mumbled against her mouth. "You know the way to the bedroom, Mulder." she laughed as he swooped her up and carried her to the waiting bed. ***** They had fallen asleep after making love wrapped in each other's arms. Scully wasn't sure what had wakened her and glanced at the alarm clock as she padded to the bathroom, tripping over one of Mulder's shoes. Eleven twenty-one. I should have guessed, she thought wearily. She wrapped herself in the bathrobe she had hanging on the hook on the bathroom door and washed her face. She looked at herself in the mirror wondering idly if people at work were going to be able to see the change in her. She felt changed. She smiled at her reflection and at her own bit of whimsy. She was feeling so good. And hungry, she thought, remembering the left over lasagna she had stolen from her mother's in the refrigerator. Dana quietly left the bathroom and made her way to the bedroom door, pausing to stare lovingly down at her sleeping partner. He had a slightly smug look on his face and Scully smiled as she realized what had put it there. She left the door slightly ajar thinking that Mulder would worry if he woke and didn't find her. She pulled the pan of lasagna from the 'fridge and placed it on the counter. She was opening the drawer to get a knife when the pain hit. Gasping, she dropped the knife and clutched her head. The room swam as she fought to stay conscious. Oh God, it's happening again, she thought desperately. "Mulder!" she screamed although the effort made her head explode with renewed agony. She slid to the floor, not trusting her legs to hold her. "Mulder." This time her call was barely a whisper. And then he was there. Naked, his gun in hand, he ran into the kitchen, his eyes quickly scanning the room for intruders. He put the gun on the table as he saw Scully on the floor curled against the pain knifing through her brain. "Scully!" He bent over her and gently took her in his arms. "Scully, what is it? What's wrong? Tell me what's wrong." His quiet, panicked voice cut through the pain- induced haze and Dana fought to answer him. "It's happening again, Fox. They're trying to get to me again. Help me." It was too much for her to bear. She gratefully slipped into the darkness, knowing that she was safe as long as Mulder was with her. Mulder held the limp body of his lover against him. Through tears and clenched jaws, he begged, "Scully, wake up. Please, Scully, wake up. Dana..." But she was lifeless in his naked arms. The phone was across the room. He needed help. "Those bastards!" He cursed as he tried to stand and carry her to the kitchen phone. "I'll kill them, Dana, I swear I'll kill them!" He had to shift her dead weight in order to lift the receiver off the wall - carefully resting her head on his shoulder, dialed 9-1-1, and waited while the phone rang once...twice...three times... "9-1-1. What is your emergency?" "I need an ambulance! She's unconscious. 3170 W. 53 Rd. #35. Hurry!" "Sir, an ambulance has been dispatch-" he dropped the phone and turned his attention back to Dana. She was breathing, he could feel the light warmth on his wrist. He let her slide back down in to the cradle of his arms and with his face close to hers, he whispered to her delicately, "Dana, I'm here. Don't worry, help is on the way. I'm here. Dana, I love you." Her hand whipped up and grabbed his arm. The intense pain that was once again shooting through her head, blinded her, but she could hear Mulder there...somewhere. Her grip tightened as another bolt ripped through her skull. "Mulder..." she breathed. The blackness burst into red. "Mulder...pain..." Her nails dug in to his arm, drawing small drops of blood. Beads of sweat rose on her face, and her white cheeks blazed with heat. Mulder could actually feel her body temperature rise. He smoothed her hair back, "I know you have pain, Dana, help is on the way." He began to rock her trying to ease the pain by shear will. "Mulder!" The shriek erupted and chilled him to the bone. Then she began to relax. Her hand slipped down his arm causing his heart to thump in his chest. His first impulse was to hold her closer to his body - to keep her from slipping away completely. "Dana!" he cried. "Dana!" Her eyes sluggishly opened and came in to focus on Mulder's face. The intense agony that had riddled her was now just waves of ache. "Mulder," she mumbled and managed a weak smile. "There you are." "Oh, thank God." She was looking at him, recognizing him, responding to him. "Oh, thank God." He kissed her head. "Just hang on, Dana, the ambulance will be here soon." With whatever strength she still had in her, she began to struggle. "No hospital! No, Mulder, please!" He held her down, and tried to quiet her. "Scully, listen to me! You passed out, you're sick, you need to go to the hospital." Dana couldn't move anymore; all of her energy was gone. She laid motionless in his arms again and looked up at him with her blue eyes. "Please, Fox, not the hospital." Her voice was weak and pleading. "They'll be waiting for me there. No hospital." Mulder saw real fear in her eyes. "Please. Promise me...no hospital." "No," he shook his head, she needed help. "Dana, I'll come with you. You won't be alone." She closed her eyes. He wasn't listening to her. She knew she had to make him hear. "Fox," she fought once again to hold her focus on his eyes, "they're at the hospital. They are waiting for me. Please, Fox. The doctors can't help, anyway. They'll just send me home again. Please." The look he gave her told her that he was at least considering what she was saying. The door vibrated from the knocking. "Paramedics!" Mulder could feel her shaking in his arms. Her lips trembled, "Please." In the space of a breath, he lifted and carried her in to the bed room. She laid so still on the cold bed. The knock came again. "I'll take care of you," he kissed her forehead, "don't worry, Scully, you're not going anywhere." "Paramedics! Open up!" Mulder hurried out of the room and grabbed a towel from the bathroom before he answered the door. Scully could hear several voices but they seemed miles away, much farther than her front door. The room was dark still, and the crack of light that poured from the living room fell across the ceiling and twisted in to shapes. She felt the heat leave her body and a shiver worked its way up her spine. She could hear her breath leave her mouth and then draw back in again. And then she began to float up from the bed and the last thing she remembered was a warm hand on her cheek and the weight of a blanket pulling her down in to sleep. ***** Mulder must have fallen asleep sometime near dawn finally overcome by exhaustion, the dark circles under his eyes mute testimony to the battle he had fought to stay awake. The exertions of loving Dana the day before and then the emotional toll of finding her in pain on the kitchen floor had worn away the last of his strength. He was slumped in a chair in the bedroom, afraid that his presence in her bed would disturb her rest. He did not hear her as she awoke and quietly slipped from the bed and walked into the bathroom. She emerged, discarding her robe, and reached into her closet to retrieve a dark blue suit and white blouse. She pulled underwear and nylons from a drawer in her bureau and dressed in the dark. As she headed to the bedroom door, she paused as she looked down at her sleeping partner. A puzzled frown appeared on her face. Mulder? Why is Mulder here? Her brain sluggishly turned the question around in her mind but gave up the struggle when no answer was immediately apparent. She was reaching for the front door to her apartment when his hand grabbed her wrist and turned her to face him. "Dana, where are you going?" he asked, his voice still rough from lack of sleep and the tears he had shed while he kept vigil. "Mulder?" she questioned turning glazed eyes to his face. "What are you doing here? Why aren't you dressed? It's time for class, isn't it?" His eyebrows shot up. "No, Scully," he said gently. "There's no class today. You need to go back to bed." He took her arm and began to lead her back but she pulled away from him. Her momentum made her stumble into the wall and she barely caught herself before falling. A look of fear and anger flashed across her features. "No! Stay away from me!" she hissed. "I can't miss class again. You can't make me! Can't you hear them?" "Dana, sweetheart, listen to me. Listen. It's all right." His voice was pleading and he slowly reached for her again. "Mulder?" recognition lighting her eyes. She suddenly stiffened and threw herself against the wall, her hands clutching her head in pain. "Dana!" he yelled as he closed the distance between them. He lifted her unresisting body and carried her to the bed. He should have sent her to the damn hospital, he thought, berating himself as he was trying to make her more comfortable. "Dana, can you hear me? Dana?" "Fox?" she asked. Slowly she opened her eyes. "Oh, Fox! What's happening to me?" She began to cry softly. "You're going to the hospital," he said firmly reaching for the phone. "No! I can't go to the hospital. I told you why I can't go to the hospital," she said almost panicking at his words. Her grasp locking onto his arm. "I'm OK. Listen to me! The pain is gone now but it will come back. I know it will! They're trying to drive me into going back to the hospital. They almost killed me once there, let's not give them another chance." She had his attention now. He hesitated and then returned the handset to its cradle. "What do you want me to do?" She rested back against the bed but held onto his arm. "This is going to sound crazy but I want you to call Melissa. She knows what's going on and I trust her. She was able to help for awhile before." "Yeah, some help. If she had told me what was going on from the start..." "I asked her not to tell you, Fox. We don't know that anything would be different now if we had told you sooner. Please, Fox, call her. Tell her to come over here. We'll decide what to do once she gets here." He looked into her watery, blue eyes and finally nodded his acceptance. Once again he reached for the phone and dialed. As he spoke into the mouthpiece, Dana reached up and brushed his hair from his face. Not breaking his conversation, he smiled down into her eyes , caught her hand and brought her palm to his lips. "OK, Melissa. We'll be here. Be as quick as you can." He hung up the phone and turned his full attention on this woman who had so recently become his lover. "She'll be here soon. Let's get you undressed." "Not now, Mulder," she said giving him a tired smile. "I've got a headache." ***** "And why did she not go to the hospital? What sane person would not go to receive treatment if the pain was as great as you are trying to suggest? Could it be that you have once again miscalculated; that you proved yourself useless to us again?" The menace in his voice was unmistakable despite its cultured tones. "Sir, I don't know. I can't explain it. Her conditioning should be sufficient to bring her back to us or else cause her tremendous pain. We had our people waiting at any possible hospital that she might have been taken to. We know that the paramedics had been summoned to her address but...." "But, what? She sent them away? She was able to be coherent enough to convince them that she didn't need their assistance? Then I would say doctor, that your techniques are flawed. Dangerously flawed. I begin to wonder if this project is worth the effort." "Sir, please, you must understand...." "Understand what, you bumbling fool? That first you bungled your task with Frank Kellogg and his family and now you're well on the way of creating a similar disaster with Agent Scully. Is that what you want me to understand?" His patience was at an end. He had heard that Scully and Mulder had found Kellogg and had made arrangements to bring him back to Chicago. He was still trying to analyze the ramifications of this event. He raised his cold, black eyes back to the doctor trembling before him. "What do you propose to do now, Doctor? How are we to salvage this situation?" ***** "Mulder, you've got to calm down. Dana was probably right not to go to the hospital. They were able to get to her once there and they very well might have tried again. She's all right for the time being. We've got to figure out a way to keep her that way." "Missy?" Dana's voice called weakly from the bedroom. Melissa rose from the couch where she had been sitting with Mulder reviewing recent events. She shook her head as he started to come with her. "No. You wait out here. I want to talk with Dana. Alone," she said firmly when he tried to protest. "Try and get some rest." Mulder's energy was rapidly fading. He reluctantly stretched out on the couch and promised himself that he would only close his eyes briefly. His mind wandered back to a happier time spent on this couch. Scully's body under his as he kissed her, as he caressed her breast, her smell and taste.... He drifted off to sleep. ***** "Sis, how are you feeling?" "I'm OK. How's Mulder?" "Dana, how do you think he is? He's upset. He looks like shit and he's beating himself for not sending you to the hospital. Now tell me how you're really feeling." Scully smiled as she reached for her sister's hand. "I'm really OK. The headache is gone, at least for now. And I'm not dreaming. I am scared, though, Missy." "Have you been doing the mental exercises we practiced?" "No. There didn't seem to be much point. I thought that.... I don't know what I thought." Melissa sighed. She should have known that Dana wouldn't have seen the value of continuing with something that couldn't be explained with science. They would need to start over. "You hoped it would be over. That they were done with you. I understand, Dana, but obviously they're not. They took you away for a reason and whatever it is, they're not done." Dana eyes filled with unshed tears. As much as she tried to deny any after effects of her abduction, she knew that she was going to have to come to terms with those missing months. Melissa was right. Whoever these bastards are, she thought grimly, they aren't done with me. Well, they've make a big mistake. Melissa was closely studying her sister's face. She was pleased to see the fighting glint returning to Dana's eyes. It was time to start fighting back. But where? "Sis, we've got to get you out of here, soon. Too many people know how to find you here. Do you have any ideas of where might be safe?" Dana had been thinking of much the same thing. All of her contacts though were suspect. She could not trust that they wouldn't be able to find her if she went to any of her friends. With a growing sense of hopelessness and frustration, she looked at her older sister. Suddenly, Melissa smiled. "I know just the place," she breathed. ***** "Mulder, it will be perfect. No one would think to look for her there. There are woods, it's quiet, so we can plan our next move...." Melissa's voice trailed off. She was getting tired of arguing with him about this. "No, it's too isolated. We'd be cut off from help if we needed it." "It's a retreat house, Mulder. It's a place for meditation and spiritual growth. It's suppose to be isolated and cut off. And what do you mean 'we'? You need to stay here." "Not on your life," he said firmly. His eyes locked onto Scully's. I won't leave you, he thought. Scully only nodded. Don't, was her silent reply. Melissa looked from one to the other. There was something different about their interaction with each other. Ah, she thought as the insight hit, it's about time. "OK," she said. "We all go." ***** The three Lone Gunmen stood in a huddle as a roll of paper spilled from the desk printer. They had been working around the clock for their friend, Mulder, hoping to get any information about what had recently happened to his partner. "So how's she doing?" Frohike bounced to the man sitting in the shadowy corner. "Is she recovering?" Mulder nodded. "She's taking a vacation. She's resting." A boyish grin broke out on Frohike's face, "Maybe she needs a good full body massage." Mulder gave him a stern look. "Down, boy." He wasn't about to go in to details with these guys about the new relationship that had developed with Dana. It was none of their business, and besides, he knew about Scully's thoughts about them - and he was confident that Frohike's adorable puppy love wasn't reciprocated. Langly ripped the page off the machine and handed it to Mulder. "This is it - so far. We can keep looking for you, but they've wiped the slate clean. Man, it's gone." Mulder frowned at the scarce information on the document in his hands. There were some names, some numbers, some medical terms, and lots of white space. "Thanks, guys." He stood discouraged. He shook his head and walked toward the door. Why was this so hard? This was the only case that he ever needed closure for and he couldn't get it. How was he supposed to protect Scully when he didn't know what or whom he was protecting her from? "You're not supposed to protect her," Byers offered, "just help her." Mulder spun around. Oh, God, he thought, I said that aloud! Langly nodded, "These people, Mulder, they're not out to kill her, or she'd be dead by now. But judging from the incident in the hospital, I'd say they definitely want her back." Mulder hadn't told them about the recent pains, either. He trusted these guys, but not completely. Not as much as he trusted Dana. Mulder's fist hit the wall, and everyone jumped. He exhaled and turned from the men, "Just keep looking. Please." Before he shut the door behind him, he mumbled to them, "You won't be able to reach me for a while. If you find anything, leave the coded message on my voice mail. I'll get it." Once the room settled again, Frohike's face dropped and he shoved his hands into the pocket of his jacket, "Yep. He did her." ***** Mulder returned to pick up Scully and her sister, and they drove for nearly five hours to an isolated forest deep in West Virginia. Melissa's best friend, Paul, had given her a key three years prior as a birthday gift; telling her she was welcome to use the two-room cabin any time she liked. Just to keep it clean and keep the wood store full. She knew that Paul was hiking through Germany for the next seven months, so the cabin would be empty. The perfect place. No one could possibly trace Dana to it. Melissa slouched comfortably on a fallen tree that lay not twenty feet from the cabin. The sun was warm in the cool autumn air and the woods surrounding her were alive with birds and squirrels and sounds of life. "Paradise," she mumbled idly to herself. With a swoop, she hiked her long, flowing skirt up above her knees and allowed the warmth of the sun to bathe her legs. "Dana will get well here," Melissa was confidant. "The healing forces are strong." She allowed a smile to spread across her features, until she saw Mulder. He closed the door to the cabin and once he spotted Melissa, skirt in her lap and legs sprawled open, he made his way to her and seated himself on the log beside her. "We've got enough supplies for about a week." With her eyes closed, she nodded a response. "And I've got the CB set up in case we need any help. She turned to look at him. "I'm going to do a perimeter sweep and see what's in our immediate vicinity, so stay near Dana in case she needs anything." "Mulder," she sat up, "your negative energy won't help her to get well." "Yeah, well, it won't help her if we're ambushed, either." The sarcasm that trimmed his voice left a sour look on her face. "Look you help Scully in your way, and I'll help her in mine. You don't have to agree with my methods - I certainly don't agree with yours - but she needs us both right now." Melissa's eyes dropped to the gun on his hip. She knew, for what ever reason, Dana loved this man. And she could sense his commitment and love for her. Arguing with him about ideas he just couldn't see would be like teaching a dog to play the saxophone. "Alright. I'll be here with her." Mulder stood and scanned the area, and then started for some point to the left of the cabin. She watched him go and remarked to herself, "Well he's handsome, I guess, and passionate. But sis, you've found yourself a blind man." She had no idea just how far off she was. ***** The sun was setting through the trees and Melissa had a fire crackling in the hearth. Dinner, consisting of bread and vegetarian chili was waiting covered on the wide wooden table. Next to it, on the floor sat the two sisters, facing each other, eyes closed, hands resting comfortably on crossed legs. Once Dana had awaken, Melissa was anxious to get her sister back into the mental exercises she had been neglecting. Mulder still hadn't come back from playing FBI man, Melissa reasoned, so this was the ideal time for Dana to get started again. The fire light played brightly in Dana's red hair. The air in the cabin was still and warm, and Dana still felt very sleepy; almost hung over. Meditation was a lot more difficult than she had initially thought. It took an enormous amount of energy to force herself to concentrate and sit still and relax. She had to will the muscles in her shoulders to release. And then, once she moved on to relaxing another part of her body, her shoulders made their way back up to her ears. The slam of the door caused Scully to nearly jump out of her skin. She reached instinctively for the gun to her right, which of course wasn't there, before Melissa opened her mouth and, "Damn it, Mulder," slipped out. Mulder saw the two of them on the floor and pursed his brows. "What's going on?" The two looked up at him, Dana with her hand clutching her speeding heart, and Melissa with a scowl that could scare the devil, himself. "Scully are you all right?" She breathed, "I'm fine Mulder." And managed a smile. "Let's eat." Over dinner, Mulder described what he had found. He had run across a stream running down the side of the mountain, just north and east of the cabin about two hundred yards. To the west about six hundred yards was a cliff that dropped down a hellova' long way. And, as far as Mulder could tell, there was only one way up or down the mountain - the dirt road that brought the three of them up there in the first place. Tactically, this cabin did seem to be a good idea after all. The only problem was that the cabin was just so damn far away from civilization that (should Dana need one) it would take them at least three hours to get to a doctor. Scully interrupted with a tongue in cheek, "Good thing I'm a doctor." She was the only one that let out a giggle. The rest of the dinner was eaten in silence. By 8:30, Dana couldn't keep her eyes open any longer. She laid her head on the table and allowed the playing cards to fall from her hand. "Time for bed," Mulder announced as he slipped his arm under her legs and gently lifted her from the bench. "Mulder, I can walk," she yawned. Melissa watched the scene develop before her with a great deal of interest. "Let me carry you," he whispered into her hair, and he felt her relax in his arms. He took her in to the only other room in the cabin and placed her in the center of the quilted, queen-sized bed. When he released her, she clung to his hand as it surfaced from under her neck. "Is your headache gone?" She lifted an eyebrow to his sincerity. "Yes..." she smiled at him, "...won't you sit here with me for a while?" "For a while." He unzipped her jeans while she watched and slipped them over her hips and down her legs. Then her socks came off, followed by her flannel shirt and under tee. In her bag in the corner he found a pair of long johns with a knit shirt to match, and carefully he dressed her in the warm blue material. She shivered as his hands worked their way up her thighs. Mulder stopped and looked up at her, "Would you rather sleep in front of the fire? I could move the bed -" "I'm not cold, Mulder." "Oh." He broke eye contact and finished dressing her, trying not to enjoy it quite so much. Scully relished all of this. "I should get sick more often," she commented. "If I get this kind of special attention from you." He chuckled lightly and kissed her forehead. "Is that all? God, I'm never getting sick again." His smile faded when her hand reached up and clutched his collar and pulled his face down to hers. They kissed, and all of Mulder's fears and desires surfaced once again. He opened his mouth as hers opened and their tongues met . Dana released a small moan, lifting her head trying to get closer. Tenderly, Mulder stopped the kiss and lowered her back to the pillow. "Get some sleep, Dana." He brushed the hair from her forehead. "I'm not that sleepy," she yawned. Her eyes closed. "Fox, will you stay with me?" He actually considered it, and then cursed himself for the hesitation. He had to be stronger than this. For Dana's sake, he had to control the emotional flood that she release in him. "No," he whispered, "I'll sleep on the couch in the other room." Dana's disappointment didn't surface to her face, but it was evident in her breathy voice. "Will you stay with me until I fall asleep?'' "That I can do." He sat on the edge of the bed, cradling her hand, watching her breath, until her lashes ceased fluttering and she eased in to sleep. When Scully was finally dreaming, Mulder covered her with several layers of quilt, and wandered back into the main room where Melissa was unfolding the sofa-bed. It was so odd that this tall, mystical woman was even related to Dana. And the two of them were so close. There were still many things about his partner that he couldn't quite understand. "So I guess we get to fight over who gets the couch." She cocked her head to him while fitting the pillow in to its case. "No, you can take it, I'll sleep on the floor." He eyed the dusty wooden floor with little excitement. Melissa glanced towards him, having expected a bout of witty repartee. Instead she saw a tired, angry man, who felt as though his world was on the brink of total collapse. She didn't particularly like Mulder, but she respected him, and she understood that her sister needed him. "Oh, Mulder, don't be ridiculous. Why don't you sleep in the bed with Dana?" His eyes widened, as he realized that she knew about Dana and him. And then smiled when he considered, that they hadn't been exactly secretive. "I don't want to disturb her." He pushed the bench farther under the table to make a larger space on the floor. "You're not sleeping on the floor." Melissa's curt responce stopped him, and he realized for the first time how tired she was, too. Recent events had been draining for everyone involved. Mulder continued to forget how closely Melissa really was involved. She motioned down to the fold-out bed, "There's enough room here for both of us." She tossed him the pillow and began to slip the second pillow in to the white cotton case. This whole situation hit him wrong. Sharing a pull-out bed with Scully's sister while she slept soundly in the queen-sized bed just didn't seem fair. But Dana needed the strength she would get from uninterrupted sleep. But then again, he thought, maybe it was possible to slip in the other room with out disturbing her and snuggle up to - "Mulder, it's not a thrill for me, either." His silence and shifting from foot to foot had told her what he was thinking. "Look," she barked at him, "I'll try to control myself, okay? Hitting on my sick sister's new boyfriend is not on the top of my 'To Do' list tonight." He took her remark for a challenge. He shrugged and remarked, "Well, as long as I'm not on your 'To Do' list..." and Melissa threw the second pillow at his head. He hurled it right back at her playfully with his toned reflexes. "Hey!" she blurted in almost a laugh, and then lowered her voice remembering the sleeping woman in the next room, "At least we understand each other now." "Oh, I wouldn't go that far." They settled into the bed, each with their own blankets, neither of them able to sleep, both listening for any sign of distress from the other room, neither of them expecting anyone else to find them in the cabin, and individually the two of them waited for the sun to rise...sometime in the next nine hours. ***** Dana woke to find Mulder's arms locked around her, his face nestled in her hair. She smiled to herself thinking how comfortably her body fit his. She considered letting herself drift back to sleep but was starting to feel restless. As she wiggled to turn onto her back, Mulder's arms tightened and he jerked himself awake. "Dana, you OK?" he asked after orienting himself to time and place. "Better than OK with you here," she smiled. "I thought you were going to sleep on the couch." "Did you know that your sister snores?" "She does not!" "She does," he replied. "Trust me." "Always." She said simply. Then she grinned mischievously. "And how do you know she snores? I thought she'd sleep in here with me." Mulder's face reddened. "You're blushing, Mulder. Just what did I miss after I fell asleep?" She gave him an arched look. "Never mind," he said with mock indignation. He lowered his lips to hers. Their kiss was long and lingering. Her arms worked their way around his neck and pulled him closer with growing passion. His hands began to caress her breasts through the material of her thermal shirt and she moaned her pleasure at his touch. The sound broke through his haze of emotion and he broke apart from her, disengaging lips and limbs. "Mulder?" she whispered. Her face was flushed with her excitement. "What's wrong?" "Nothing." He started to get out of bed but was halted by her strong arms wrapping around him. "I'm not going to break, Mulder," she breathed into his ear as she pulled herself against his back. She began exploring his body with hands and tongue. He gasped and captured her hands, pulling her into his lap. He studied her face for a long moment looking for signs of pain or illness. Seeing neither, he gathered her closer and kissed her hard, his tongue feeling its way into her mouth. Melissa's knock on the door caused them both to jump. Before they could catch their breaths, Dana's sister opened the door and laughed at their discomfiture. "Ah, there you are, Mulder. I'd wondered where you had gotten to," she giggled. "Well, carry on." She shut the door before they could respond. Mulder looked angry but Scully diverted his attention with a quick kiss. "Well, you heard her, Mulder. Where were we?" ***** By the time Mulder and Scully emerged from the bedroom, Melissa had fixed breakfast and brought more wood in from the pile outside. She wore a comfortable - looking, baggy sweater over a long skirt with her hair gathered in a loose bun at the top of her head. As she bustled about the kitchen area of the common room, Mulder sensed that she was perfectly at ease in this environment. Dana moved to assist her but was waved away. "Go start eating, you two. I'll be there in a second." She handed them two bowels of thick oatmeal. On the table was a basket of berries, a pitcher of milk and a crock of honey. When Melissa returned, she carried warmed bread from the night before and the coffee pot. The two women ate in companionable silence but Mulder was still feeling angry and embarrassed by Melissa's intrusion earlier that morning. He wanted to broach the subject but wasn't sure how to do it without offending Dana. The matter was taken out of his hands, however, when Missy caught his arm as Scully was clearing the table. "Mulder, I'm sorry about this morning," she began but stopped when she saw his skeptical look. "OK, not really but it won't happen again. I'm glad for the two of you, especially now because Dana really needs you." It was enough. Mulder was willing to call a truce. While they would never be best friends, for Dana's sake, they'd co-exist while they were here at the cabin. Mulder nodded then walked over to his briefcase. He withdrew the papers Langly had obtained for him. Scully came up beside him and peered at the file. "Mulder, where did you get this?" she asked taking them from his hands. "The guys are doing a little digging. It isn't much but it's a start." Scully nodded, already interpreting what she was reading and trying to fill in the blanks. "Mulder, there's definitely something not right here. I can't be sure what it is but there are biochemical changes here," Scully said, finally raising her head and looking at her partner. Her voice had assumed her cool professionalism but her eyes mirrored her fear. He placed his hand on her head to offer reassurance that he didn't feel. "Could these changes be causing the pain and the blackouts?" he asked. "I'm not sure. There are too many unanswered questions," she paused considering an idea. "Any chance the guys could 'dig' up Frank Kellogg's chart so I can do a comparison?" He grinned. "I'll see what I can do," he replied. ***** "I want it stopped," he said in a quiet, menacing tone. "Sir, please. We've come so far, all the work we've done..." the younger man pleaded. "All the work you've done has meant nothing!" he sneered. "They are still out there, loose, with no indication that she's responding to her conditioning. You think Mulder will stop if the only thing we succeed in doing is turning his partner into a mushroom. Nor am I sure we could explain to our superiors all the extra attention we will draw to ourselves if her mind implodes like Kellogg's. That would be pushing the bounds of coincidence, don't you think?" He took a long drag on his never ending cigarette. "Now end it." "Sir, we're not sure how she's been fighting the treatments but it must be causing her a great deal of pain. If we don't get to her, at least do some deconditioning, the pain will force her to get medical treatment and I'm not sure we can hold up to the scrutiny of a thorough medical exam. Please, let us do that much." He studied the younger man through the haze of smoke that enveloped him. Saw the anxiety, weighed his options. Finally, he nodded. "Very well. Take her," he held up a finger in warning, "but only for the deconditioning. We cannot afford any more mistakes." "And if she fights the process?" "We cannot afford any more mistakes." The younger man nodded his acquiescence. ****** By mid-morning, Mulder had taken the car an hour and a half outside the boundary of the forest and back in to cellular telephone range. He contacted the Lone Gunmen , giving them Scully's request. The trio seemed confidant that they could get at the documents now that Kellogg had been moved back to Chicago and things were still fairly chaotic around him. Two days, they had promised. Mulder smiled. On the way back in to the mountains, Mulder stopped at a small grocery store to pick up some necessities that Melissa had forgotten to stock in the cabin. Namely, Doritos and sunflower seeds. Both were, as far as Mulder was concerned, staples for good health. In the parking lot, as he placed the key in the door lock, Mulder was attacked. Two large men in dark suits threw him against the car and held him down while a third repeatedly asked, "Where is she?" Every time Mulder quipped, "Who? I haven't seen your sister in days..." he was kicked and punched. It wasn't long before Mulder couldn't see anything but the blood pouring from his forehead and cheek. The taste of blood and vomit filled his mouth and nose. Mulder gasped for a breath and it was hit out of him, again. The physical pain he could endure. Scully's safety was paramount. He knew with a steady confidence that he would die before he gave her away. But, the repeated blows to his head and chest took their toll. Just before he passed out he heard a fourth, seemingly familiar voice grunt: "Forget him. We found her, boys. Let's go get her." Then the ringing in his ears overwhelmed him and he was lost. ****** For a moment Mulder was convinced that his teeth had been shattered, but as he made his way in to the sitting position, he spit bloody pebbles in to his hand, and realized that he woke with gravel in his mouth. "Scully!" He remembered his attackers and leaped to the car. He was on the road before the door was even shut, and the trip that had taken him an hour and a half before, became forty-five minutes. He wasn't sure how long he had been unconscious. The clouds were forming a thick storm, the wind was picking up. "If they've done anything to her," he hissed. "Scully, hide. Hide from them." How had he ever let Melissa talk him in to taking Scully so far from help? He should have known this would happen. He should have prevented this. His fist hit the steering wheel as he cursed his stupidity. ***** Mulder didn't wait until the car stopped before he threw the gear in to park and jumped out. "Scully!" His panic slipped a foot out from under him and he fell forward on the uneven ground. But this didn't stop him. "Scully!" He recovered and made it halfway to the cabin door just as it opened. "Mulder?" Dana flew out the door in response to his panicked tone, Melissa not far behind. He nearly collapsed when he saw her. "My, god! Mulder what happened?" She pushed the blood-matted hair back from his face. "I'll get a towel," said Melissa, heading back to the cabin. "You're safe," he blurted as he hugged her to him. "Scully, I thought I'd lost you again." She held him, and let him shake in her arms. "Mulder, what happened?" And in the next moment he pushed her away with such force that she fell back on her palms. "It was a trick." The realization was written all over his face. "They said they knew you were here, but it was a lie. Now, I've led them right to you. Damn!" His eyes rolled and a hand went to the pounding in his head. "We have to get out of here." He grabbed her arm and began pulling her towards the car as a jeep rounded the bend in the dirt road and barreled towards them. Melissa looked on in horror as the jeep cut off Mulder and Dana from the car. She slipped further into the cabin. She had to think, figure out how best to help them. While she shrank from the thought of letting these bastards get a hold of her sister, she also realized that she must remain free to get reinforcements. It would solve nothing if she were taken as well. She glanced out the window, standing off to the side so as not to be in plain view. Four men had gotten out of the jeep. All seemed armed. Two had grabbed Dana and were pulling her towards the jeep. Melissa began to weep as she heard her sister's frantic cries for Mulder. Oh God, she thought, what can I do? The other two men were occupied with beating Mulder. He was down on the ground, trying to cover his head from the worse of their kicks and blows. Finally, one of his attackers straddled his battered body and hit him on the back of his head with the blunt end of the gun. Mulder lay still. They checked his body then split as one went to the jeep with Scully's assailants and the other hopped in Mulder's rental. His keys were still in the ignition. They were gone as quickly as they had come. Only now, they had taken Dana as well. Melissa hurried outside to check on Mulder. She could see blood running from his nose and the cuts on his head. She was more concerned about the injuries she couldn't see. He was unconscious but his pulse was strong and he seemed to be breathing OK. Now what, Melissa thought to herself. Ice, keep the swelling down. Melissa could almost hear Dana's voice. There was no ice. No ice but the well water is almost as cold. She ran back into the cabin to fetch towels and water. It seemed to take forever as Melissa sat there bathing Mulder's head before he began to stir. He groaned and his eyes remained glazed but he was able to stand and walk to the house, leaning heavily on Scully's sister. He didn't speak to her and she was sure he was disoriented, not really aware of his surroundings. She got him into the bedroom and lowered him onto the bed. By the time she got his shirt undone, he was unconscious again. His one side was turning ugly shades of blue and grayish green. His ribs were at least bruised if not broken, she thought. But he was breathing and he had been conscious for a while. Surely these were good signs. As she was gathering more towels and fresh water, Melissa caught back a sob. Dana, oh Dana, what are they doing to you? Not now, Missy. Stay busy. You've got to help Mulder. Keep him alive for Dana. For when Dana comes home. She had no doubt that Dana would come back. ****** Two Days Later Mulder hurt everywhere. He couldn't remember where he was or why he hurt but he was very aware of the pain. There seemed to faint memories of light and sweat and calling out for someone. Who? It was important but trying to force the recollections made his head spin. He was so thirsty. He felt something heavy draped across his chest. He tentatively opened her eyes and saw an arm. An arm? A woman's arm. Dana! It had to be Dana. But why was he hurting so much? He tried to reach for her but was caught by the pain in his side. He didn't think he had groaned out loud but he must have done. The figure by his side was moving and he could make out a face swimming into his field of vision. Melissa! Melissa? What was she doing here? Where was Dana? There was something about Dana he should remember. Where the hell was his eidetic memory when he needed it? He tried to talk but couldn't make his mouth move. His face seemed swollen. "Mulder? Oh thank God, Mulder! No. Don't move. Let me get you some water." She went away but he could track her movements from the noise she was making. Pouring liquid, maybe spilling some by the muffled oath she made, rummaging through drawers. Over all the more common sounds however, he thought he detected the sound of crying. Crying? Why would she be crying? When she returned she gently lifted his head to the glass she was holding. Mulder couldn't remember water tasting better. His mouth had been so dry. The water also seemed to help clear his thinking. "What?" his voice sounded foreign in his own ears. "You've been feverish. It took me forever to stop your head from bleeding and then when you did wake up you were delirious. Oh God, Mulder!" He looked at her and noticed what he hadn't seen before. The dark circles under her eyes which were red from lack of sleep and crying. Her hair was dirty and there were lines of worry marring her face which had not been there before. Bleeding. He had been bleeding? The memory of what caused him to bleed washed over him. Dana! They had been after Dana. He sat up and wished he hadn't. The pain knifed through his body and he fought to remain conscious. "Mulder! No! Lay back. Don't you dare pass out on me again." He grabbed her by the arms as she was trying to resettle him in the bed. "Dana? Where's Dana?" She sighed, debating his condition, her worry, and whether the truth would do more harm than good. "Where is she?" His anger gave him the strength to shake her. "They have her, Fox. I'm so sorry but they have her," she whispered through her renewed tears. ***** Dana woke to a pounding headache but otherwise seemed fine. She was in the back seat of the car they had rented to come to the cabin. What was she doing here? She looked around and realized that the car was parked near the general store they had gotten some supplies at the base of the mountain. How did she get here? Where was Mulder? And Melissa? Why was she here with Mulder and Melissa? She felt dizzy and let the thought go. She needed to find help. For who? She couldn't concentrate. But someone had needed help. Mulder! He was in trouble though she couldn't remember why. She climbed out of the car and grabbed the car roof to steady herself as she stood. She felt so weak. She looked around the deserted parking lot trying to get her bearings. She gave a start as she heard the sound of a car engine. Her first impulse was to hide but that would not get her the help she needed and why should she run? She wasn't the one in danger. Was she? The dizziness washed over her again and she lost track of time. When she came back to herself, a pair of strong arms were holding her on her feet and she looked into the concerned face of a State Trooper. "Ma'am, you OK? What's wrong?" Scully almost cried with relief. She gathered what little of her professionalism was left and straightened to her full height. "I'm Special Agent Dana Scully with the FBI. We're going to need some back up." ***** Melissa was having her hands full trying to calm Mulder and get him to stay in bed. After the initial shock had worn off, he was up trying to dress and figure out how to get to those who had taken his partner, now his lover. Missy was afraid that he would injure himself in his frantic attempts to do something. The sound of car engines caught both of them at the same time. Could they be coming back? Why, after two days? Mulder didn't wait for the answers. He grabbed Melissa hand and started pulling her from the cabin, his adrenaline giving him the strength he needed to stay on his feet. There would be hell to pay later, he thought, assuming there was a later. He crashed through the tree branches not minding the scratches they were causing to his already battered face. He had to put enough distance between them and possible pursuit because he knew there was no way he could stand up to another beating. "Mulder! Wait!" Melissa called, slipping down the embankment he was pulling her through. "Wait." "Not now, Melissa. We've got to keep moving." "No! It's Dana! I know it's Dana," she said with such conviction that he paused. "How do you know that? How can you possibly know that? Those men aren't playing games, Melissa!" "I just know," she replied and shook herself free from his loosened grip. She turned and began to scramble up the hill. He was so angry he couldn't think. He debated leaving her to face them alone but knew that he couldn't. Despite his personal feelings, she was still Dana's sister. He started to follow her. As they crept closer to the cabin, they froze at the grumble of male voices. Mulder shot a poisoned look at his companion. If she brought them back just so they could be taken.... He turned to go, when he heard another voice calling. "Mulder! Missy!" It was her. Dana. She was alive! Relief almost brought Mulder to his knees. But was she OK? They had had her before, done things to her. It didn't matter, not now. He and Melissa continued back to the cabin, trying to keep their noise to a minimum, just in case. As they rounded the front of the building, they stopped in amazement. There were at least four state cop cars and two unmarked vehicles. Men in uniforms and suits swarmed through the door and were beginning to head for the woods. In the center of the chaos stood Scully, her red hair catching Mulder's immediate attention. He was moving towards her on instinct. "They've got to be around here somewhere. Those bloody towels didn't just materialize by themselves, dammit!" She had her back to him and was yelling at one of the troopers standing before her. The trooper saw Mulder's approach and catching his distracted gaze Scully turned. She had a glimpse of a swollen and bruised face but didn't have time for a full assessment of his injuries before she was caught up in his embrace. However he might be feeling physically, he was better now that she had been returned to him. ***** Epilogue "It's gone, Mulder. I had gotten into the hospital's medical records, no problem but as soon as I tapped into Kellog's files-- gone," Langly said, shaking his head. He sat staring at his computer as if it had betrayed him. "It's over, Mulder. There's nowhere else to look," Scully said quietly. They had contacted the Gunmen as soon as they had returned to Washington. The bruises on Mulder's face and his stiff movements gave grim testimony to what had happened during their little "get-away" to help Scully recover. They stood close to each other, closing ranks, letting no one else into their private world. Sensing this, Byers led his comrades to the other side of the room. "Scully, it's there. It's got to be there," Mulder said. "Mulder, Frank is gone, taken right out of that hospital without a trace. His records are gone. The files we have are so incomplete they're useless." "No. I'm not talking about records and files, Scully. The information about what's been happening is there, in your head." His whisper was a plea. Scully paled. "I can't remember anything. I told you that." She started to move away from him but was stopped by his hand on her arm. "Melissa told me you were refusing to continue the meditation exercises. You won't talk to a therapist. Scully, why?" He was trying to understand, to see it from her point of view. Trying not to let his own frustration get in the way of what was best for her. "I just can't. It's not time. I know that sounds crazy but I keep getting the feeling that there's more to come from this but if I push it before all the pieces are in place...." She shrugged knowing how nonsensical, how illogical, she was being. Mulder nodded, accepting her feelings, at least for now, and drew her closer to him. He didn't care who was in the room, who was there and saw. They had agreed to keep this part of their relationship a secret for now. It would only complicate things at work, give people an excuse to separate them, and it really was no one's business. But, he needed to hold her and he doubted the guys would mind. Well, except for Frohike.... The End