Title: Abah IV: Point of View Author: Susan Proto Category: Story, Angst, MSR/Skinner/Maggie Spoilers: Through Demons Summary: Continuing the saga of Mulder's recuperation from his serious illness, but as seen from his partner's point of view. Archive: Yes Disclaimer: These characters belong to 10/13 productions and Chris Carter. Since these bouts of delusions of grandeur refuse to leave me, I continue to think I have a clue as to what I'm doing.... so I'm borrowing the characters of Mulder, Scully, Skinner, Maggie and Ma Mulder (here known as Margaret.... Come on Mr. Carter, give the lady the dignity of having a first name this season, okay?? You can even use Margaret, be my guest!) Anyway, I won't keep them (unless Mr. Carter would like me to...) and I will give them back at the end of the story. Honest. I promise. Believe me.... (or you could still believe the lie? ;->) Introduction: Yeah, yeah, I know I wrote that Abah III was going to be the last in the series. Well, obviously you should learn not to believe me... I lied. I did this piece at the urging of the very kind, persistent, and persuasive Vickie Moseley, who basically guilted me into writing Scully's perspective. ;-) Thank you Vickie for taking the time to look over the first draft and for your wonderful suggestions. I asked you to be brutally sympathetic rather than sympathetically brutal, but instead, you were just plain patient and helpful. For those of you who haven't read the previous parts of this saga, I would suggest that you read at least Part I for some background. Parts II and III would probably help you with the story continuity. Will there be a Part V? I suppose there could be, but I won't know unless I hear from you. I need to know if I should have quit while I was ahead or if it makes sense to go on. It's a blast hearing from people with positive comments and constructive criticism. I know, I don't always get my tenses right... (I try JoAnn, I really tried Vickie....Goodness, I can't even get it right in the intro.! ;->) But if I'm still making a lot of errors in that department, I want to know that too. So, I await your comments, because I really do need to hear from you! Thanks in advance! Send feedback and constructive criticism to my e-mail address: STPteach@aol.com Abah IV: Point of View by Susan Proto Part 1/7 Dana breathed a sigh of relief when they emerged from the bathroom. It had already been a good forty minutes since Skinner dragged Mulder in there. She had listened to him as he cried and puked, and cried and dry heaved, and cried... She had heard his cries for so many days...weeks... was it turning into months now? Both men were crying now, but through the tears there were also smiles. Skinner held Mulder around the waist while Mulder's arm wrapped around Skinner's shoulder for support. Mulder walked out this time, as opposed to when Skinner had carried him into the bathroom where he, essentially, threw up his past. Dana remembered back to that day when Mulder first came down with the symptoms for meningitis. She recalled how helpless she had felt then, and how guilty she _still_ felt. She had ignored his symptoms. *How could I have done that? As a doctor I should have realized something was wrong? How?...,*she berated herself. She had yet to forgive herself for discounting Mulder's complaints while she had readied herself for their weekly meeting with Skinner. So, when he had collapsed in Skinner's office..... Dana felt so helpless. She had watched the paramedics as they worked on Mulder, but as a doctor, she was aware of just how sick he was, and knew there was a real possibility that he might not survive this time. Throughout all the weeks of high fevers, seizures, delirium, vertigo and deafness, Dana stayed nearby. She wanted to do anything and everything for her partner, because he was her best friend and the love of her life. But there was a limit to what even she, Dana Scully, Super FBI Special Agent, MD, could have done for him. What she hadn't counted on was what their boss did for him. Dana looked at Skinner, smiled slightly and thought to herself, *Who knew?* Walter S. Skinner, Assistant Director of the FBI, her tall, muscle-bound, with intense eyes behind stern conservative glasses, balding boss... ..became Fox Mulder's lifeline. He took on the role of a figure from Mulder's childhood, "Abah," a surrogate father who had loved him unconditionally. As Dana observed the two men together, she realized Skinner must have developed those same feelings. Dana looked back at Mulder. Her Mulder. Fox W. Mulder, a Special Agent for the FBI, her partner in the X-Files division, tall and lanky, but way too thin at the moment, shaggy haired, was very much in love with her, Dana Katherine Scully. And, oh, how she loved him, unconditionally. Margaret Scully walked over to her daughter and placed supportive arms around her. "I think we've reached a turning point, yes?" she whispered to her youngest and surviving daughter. "Yes, Mom. I think so." Dana looked at her mom with different eyes. She always knew how much her mom cared for Mulder, hell, for all intents and purposes she had adopted him as her very own from the moment she met him. But it had been a while since she viewed her mother as anything other than a maternal figure. So it came as a small shock when she realized that during these last several weeks of Mulder's illness, her mom and boss had become close, very, very close. Skinner was giving so much of his energy to succor Mulder, that he had come to rely on Margaret Scully for some much needed emotional support of his own. Maggie, a loving and caring person, was more than willing to provide it, so how could Skinner not have helped but fall totally and completely in love with her. But Dana also realized her mom was in love with Walter Skinner. She didn't want to admit it, but Dana recognized she was not entirely comfortable with her mom loving someone besides her beloved father, Ahab. It was, however, something she would need reconcile herself with, and from the look of things, it would need to be soon. Dana next turned to her left and saw Elizabeth Mulder. She was staying at the Scully house to aid in her son's recuperation, though just how much of a positive effect she would have on Mulder's recovery was questionable in Scully's mind. At first Dana had pitied her, but then the more thought she gave to it, she realized she honestly hated her. She hadn't recalled ever truly hating anyone before, with perhaps the exception of Cancerman. But Dana knew, without a doubt, she felt hatred toward this woman. She wondered how a woman, who claimed to love her son, could have allowed him to be physically and emotionally abused throughout his childhood and, to a great extent, his adulthood. How could she say she loved him? *Bullshit,* Dana thought to herself, *the woman doesn't know the meaning of the word. Elizabeth Mulder had in her possession all the truths he ever wanted and needed, yet all she gave him were excuses. So many excuses,* she thought. *How long can you live on excuses?* The woman had excuses for everything. Her husband didn't love her, so he worked too much. Her husband ignored her, so she had an affair and got pregnant. The times back then made it difficult for her to leave, so she stayed in a loveless marriage. Her husband ignored his family, and allowed her young daughter to be abducted by a government conspiracy. Her husband took his anger and frustration out on his own son and beat him over, and over, and over. *Damn her, and her damned excuses,* Dana wanted to yell. Dana couldn't help but wonder how different life would have been for Mulder had he grown up with parents such as Maggie and Bill Scully. Dana wasn't blind to the imperfections of her family, but in comparison to the hell Fox lived through, she had an utopian childhood. But Skinner and Mulder now both emerged with smiles. They looked first at Elizabeth. They wanted her to see her son had survived yet another trauma. Then they looked toward Maggie and Dana. Walter caught Maggie's eyes and looked at her with an intensity and love that she hadn't seen since her beloved Captain was alive. But it was the look that Fox Mulder gave Dana Scully that really electrified the room. He offered his free hand to her, but he was still unsteady on his feet and not yet willing to let go of his physical and emotional connection to Skinner. She walked to him, and as soon as she took his extended hand, he released Skinner and enveloped her with his arms. He smothered the tiny red head against his chest, and she encircled his waist with her two loving arms. She murmured a continuous mantra of " I love you's" and held on to him tightly. Finally, the ramifications of his all too recent illness, as well as the draining effects of the intense emotions caught up to him, and his legs began to shake with fatigue. Dana felt him start to slip and looked to Walter for help. His strong arms reached for him, and though Mulder didn't really want to let go of his Dana, he realized he'd crumple to the floor in a matter of seconds if he didn't lay down. Both Walter and Dana helped Mulder onto the sofa bed in Maggie Scully's den. He then stretched out in an upright position, reached for Dana's hand, and pulled her onto the bed with him. He wrapped his arms around her shoulder and then looked about the room. He caught his mother's eye. Elizabeth looked directly at her son and said loudly and clearly, "Fox, dear, are you okay?" "No need to shout, Mom," he replied. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to shou___," Elizabeth stopped abruptly and looked totally confused. Dana felt just as confused. Before Skinner dragged Mulder into the bathroom, she had been using a combination of sign language and finger spelling in an attempt to translate his mother's words. The bout of meningitis had left him almost totally deaf. There was a question as to whether it would be a permanent condition, but the shock of possibly getting an answer to that question so soon was almost too much for Scully to comprehend. "I can hear, Mom." He said it quietly and distinctly. He then turned to Dana and repeated the statement to her, "I can hear, Dana." She watched Elizabeth as she drew her hands together in front of her face as in prayer, an act that caused Dana to actually smile, as she realized where Fox had picked up that same little idiosyncrasy. "Thank God," she heard Elizabeth murmur over and over again. "Thank God." End part 1/7 email: STPteach@aol.com **************************************************** Abah IV: Point of View by Susan Proto disclaimers in part 1 Part 2/7 "Your hearing came back?" Dana said, having not quite believed his words. It had been so difficult for her to deal with Fox and his deafness. She had felt enormous frustration in trying to communicate with him about the daily tidbits of life as well as the necessary information for his medical treatment. But as much as she had felt frustrated, she had also felt his fear. Mulder had been so frightened that his hearing loss was going to be permanent. His feelings of isolation were palpable, and Dana shared those fears. She had begun to envision a lifetime of silent communication between her and her partner, something they had frequently indulged in before his illness, but by choice, not necessity. So when he said those words, all Dana could do was echo them back. "You can hear?" she asked in awe. She was looking right into his eyes. "You can really hear me?" "Yes, I can hear you," he replied looking directly back at her. "After I finished puking my guts up, we just started talking," he said turning towards Walter, "and before either of us realized it, I could hear." "He's still very unsteady on his feet though, so I don't think the ear infection is totally gone," Walter cautioned, but then more optimistically added, " but I would guess when the ears totally heal, the vertigo will subside too." "You're going in for a hearing test tomorrow," Scully said in her best MD's voice. She noticed that while Mulder was looking at Skinner, he didn't respond to her words. She touched his shoulder to gain his attention. "A hearing test, tomorrow, buster." "Yes, Doc," Mulder replied with a smile and then a yawn. "Guys, I think I need to sleep now. Could we resume this party a little later?" Dana began to climb out of the bed. "You can stay if you want," he said shyly. Maggie looked at her daughter and the man she hoped would become her son-in-law someday. "You __both__ look as though you could use a nap. Come along old people, let's go have a cup of tea in the kitchen, and let the kids catch some zzzzzz's," she said with a chuckle. Dana watched her mom and Walter help Elizabeth out of the chair. She looked a little stunned by the events of the last couple of hours, and could probably use a good stiff drink instead of tea. They probably all could. "Oh! Dana!?" Elizabeth gasped. Dana saw a look of horror on Elizabeth Mulder's face. "Oh shit." Dana cupped her hand under her nose trying to catch the blood that trickled down. For some reason, up till this point, the powers that be had seen fit to not remind everyone there were actually two very ill FBI agents in their midst. Whatever nosebleeds Dana had incurred over the last month and a half were in private, and out of the sight of everyone. "Dana, are you okay?" Elizabeth asked, confused that no one else seemed to be as taken aback by this latest turn of events as she. "I'm fine. I'm just fine." Walter handed her his white linen handkerchief. Dana took it from him and, with merely a look, let him know this hanky would never be quite the same again. He nodded, and she wiped her nose with it and then applied some pressure to stop the flow. Through all of this Dana watched Mulder desperately trying to keep control of his emotions. She also realized his mother had been unaware of her condition and was now overwhelmed. Dana was afraid to get into an explanation now, as she was concerned for Mulder, and didn't want him to have to deal with the added stress. She hoped everyone else would have the good sense to keep quiet for the moment. "I think it's stopped. I'm just going to wash up. Go on you guys, I'm fine." Dana climbed out of bed to go into the bathroom. "Go have your tea. I'm fine. Really. Mulder, go to sleep. I'll be back as soon as I clean up a bit. Please." She walked into the bathroom and close the door behind her. Dana thought about locking the door, but ever the sensible and pragmatic Dr. Scully, she decided to leave it accessible. Dana stared at the reflection in the mirror, and wasn't too thrilled with what she saw. She saw a pale, even paler than usual, face and dark circles under bloodshot blue eyes. She knew it was because she was worried about Mulder. She was sure of it. But now she was worried about herself...and Mulder. Always, she worried about Mulder. Dana sat down on the floor heavily and leaned back against the shower stall. These had to have been the most draining months of Sundays she'd ever spent. She sat and tried to clear her mind of everything, but realized she couldn't. Her thoughts kept drifting back to that morning she told him to 'get his ass into the office because she refused to face Skinner alone.' She didn't know he was going to collapse. Just as she didn't know Skinner would become one of his fiercest allies. Just as she didn't know that within a month Skinner and her mom would fall in love. Just as she didn't know she and Mulder would declare their love for one another in front of everyone. Just as she didn't know if he would come out of this a whole person.... Dana thought out loud, "Oh God, I saw him so close to dying, and now that he's going to recover, you remind me that __I'm__ the one who is dying. Damn it! It's not fair. It's not fair... I am not ready for this!" The tears slowly ran down her cheeks. She heard a knock on the door. She didn't want to see Mulder right now. She needed some time to herself so she could just vent and get it out of her system, but with Mulder she felt she always had to be the strong one. She felt too damned tired to be the strong one just now. And she really didn't want to deal with her mother either. As much as Dana loved her mother, and appreciated all of the love and support she received from her, she hated to be made to feel as though she were eight years old again, which Maggie unconsciously did sometimes. Scully needed to maintain whatever control she had over this disease and needed to feel like a grown-up who could handle things. Her mom had enough trouble seeing her as a fully grown adult when she was healthy. But there was another reason too. As supportive as her mom had been since she was diagnosed, Maggie Scully was also very angry. She was angry that cancer would choose to attack and take another of her daughters. Dana didn't think she had the strength to soothe her mother's anger right now. No, now was not the time for her mother to appear.. The door opened slowly, and though Scully was already to voice a protest, she held her tongue. Not Mulder. Not Mom. Not even Elizabeth. Skinner. It was Skinner at the door. "You've been in here for awhile. Mulder and your mom were getting antsy." He slipped in the small room and closed the door behind him. "You okay?" "I'm fine." "Funny, Mulder said you just might say that. He also told me not to believe a syllable of it." Walter smiled a gentle smile. He wasn't making fun of her, nor was he trying to make light of her very real feelings and fears.... He was just trying to connect. "Sir___," "You know," he said as he sank down to sit by her side against the shower stall, "I think you can start calling me Walter outside of the office. I mean, we've both been through a helluva roller coaster ride these last six - seven weeks, and well, I would really like it if you would." "Walter," she stammered, "I'm sorry, that sounds so odd coming out of my mouth." "It sounds fine, Scully." "Umm, Si__, I mean Walter?" He nodded to her to go on. "Do you think, maybe, outside of the office, you could call me Dana?" Skinner chucked at the request, "With pleasure, Dana." Then he turned more somber and asked. "Now, what's going on?" She sat there quietly thinking about that very question. How could she answer him when she wasn't sure of the answers herself? "Dana. Dana, listen to me." Walter cupped her chin with his large hand. "We've all been through hell and back again these last couple of months, and it's not over yet. He's still wobbly, and will probably still have some pretty intense therapy sessions to go through before he's a hundred percent again. "I don't even know if he has all of his hearing back. He seems to hear better when he's looking directly at you when you're speaking. I wouldn't be surprised if he'll need to wear a hearing aid___" "Oh that'll go over real swell, won't it," Dana interjected. "Like a visit from Cancerman himself," Walter replied. Dana sighed at that, and her shoulders slumped a little. She saw Walter jerk his head back and realized he probably wanted to kick himself at that moment for being insensitive. "I'm sorry," he said. "Oh, there's nothing to be sorry about. Look, I have cancer. I have a tumor inside my head. It's there, it's not going away, and there's nothing that anyone can do to change that." Scully was in doctor mode, relaying the words with a detached voice that made you think she was talking about one of the cadavers she cuts up during an autopsy. "No. Dana, we will find a cure for this," Walter said with quiet determination. "Bullshit. Sorry, Sir, but I am getting so sick and tired of hearing that. Mulder keeps saying that, but we all know it's just bullshit. There is no cure for a nasal pharyngial tumor, and I just wish everyone would accept that. I know I have to accept it." "Bullshit yourself!" Dana startled at that, and saw Walter looked as upset as he sounded. "Dana, when the hell did believing in your God and believing in those who love you take a back seat to only a pragmatic, scientific viewpoint? For crying out loud, haven't your ideas changed even a little since you started working with Mulder? Can't you go beyond the obvious and try to believe in extreme possibilities?" "I stopped believing in miracles," she replied in a whisper. "How could you stop believing in miracles?" he asked. End part 2/7 email: STPteach@aol.com ************************************************** Abah IV: Point of View by Susan Proto Disclaimer in part 1 Part 3/7 "How? Damn it!" Now it was Walter's turn to be startled by the angry voice. "Oh I have lots of reasons! How could I? Well maybe I could stop believing when I've had to listen to a man live a horrific life through nightmares that tear him up night after night. Maybe I could stop believing when I've had to go to him and hold him until the sobs finally subside hours later, and then maybe he'd get a couple of hours of sleep. "How could I stop believing? When I'm told by a mother that she was forced to deny anything was wrong with her husband who beat the shit out of their son, because it was the _politically correct_ thing to do at the time. "I could stop believing when a bullet that was meant for me killed my only sister instead. She didn't get a chance to fulfill her dreams, Walter. Why would I believe in anything after that? "But I could give you other reasons, Walter. I could stop believing after I lost three months out of my life and haven't a clue as to what the hell they did to me, except through the nightmares that send me screaming into __his__ arms in the middle of the night! "I don't know exactly what they did to me, except that they gave me this cancer. That is something I do believe now. But there isn't a damned thing anyone can do about it. So, do you really need to ask how I could stop believing? "Walter, when they took control of my body, did those __tests__, and gave me this cancer, I had no choice but to stop believing. When they took my choices away from me, Walter, I stopped believing in me." "But, Dana, _he_ believes in you, enough for __both__ of you. He loves you so much. Can't you believe what a miracle _that_ in and of itself is? This was a man who was afraid to let anyone come even within touching distance of him, much less fall in love with them." She looked at him thoughtfully. "Are you describing just Mulder, Sir, or are you describing yourself too?" she asked reverting back to formality. Skinner sat quietly for a moment, lost in his thoughts. "Perhaps I am. I won't deny it's been a long time since I'd allowed anyone close to me too." He sat quietly with her for another minute, contemplating what to say next. How could he convince her how important she was to everyone, how important it was for her to keep fighting back and not give up. "I lost my faith in Viet Nam, Dana. I lost it when I was ordered to shoot a child outfitted in a vest of grenades and then watched pieces of his head go flying around in ten different places. "I lost it when Lin, the first woman I'd ever fallen in love with, ran to this child of her people, and died in an explosion that left _me_ deaf for two weeks. "I lost my faith when I saw my entire patrol get ambushed and die before my very eyes. I found myself floating above my own body, and wished I would die so I could join Lin and my comrades, but instead, I woke up two weeks later in a Saigon hospital feeling so alone. I didn't think I would ever find my faith again. "But I did. I found it again when I met you and Mulder. But I didn't have to survive a lifetime of abuse like he did. My God, Dana, the fact that he survived this illness is a wonder, but he fact that he survived his childhood is a downright miracle. He should have been dead so many times before, so many times.... But he didn't die, and he didn't totally shut himself off from the world. He allowed a little portal to remain open for you. "And you jumped in all the way, and Lord knows, he hasn't been the same since. Dana, you gave him a reason to live his life again. You gave him reason to hope he even had a life to live. Don't you see what a miracle that is? Believe in him. Please, believe in yourself." Dana leaned into Walter's shoulder. She felt comforted by his honesty, and wanted to draw as much strength from him as possible. "I'm scared." She said it so softly, he almost hadn't heard her. "You don't need to be scared anymore. Dana, you've got people to help you get beyond the fear." "Who's going to help Mulder and my mom get beyond their fear?" she asked. "I guess that would be me," he said simply. Dana looked at Walter Skinner with an even greater thoughtfulness. He seemed so incredibly sure of himself, yet there was a vulnerability that shone through as well. She realized that it was a rare window that had opened between them. "Walter, I know these last few weeks have been stressful and emotional, and__," "But Dana," Skinner interjected, "I _want_ to be there for them." He paused for a moment and then continued, "God knows, I want to there for your mother all the time. I mean, I want to be there for her in sickness, in health, and in happiness too, Dana," he declared. Dana looked at Skinner wide eyed. The man told her, in not so many words, that he was in love with her mother. She felt slightly light headed and didn't know if she dared say what was going through her mind. *Oh what the hell,* she thought. "Why Walter Skinner, are you asking me for my mother's hand in marriage?" Dana said with a giggle. Skinner laughed along with her. She looked so beautiful when she laughed. "Well, perhaps I am, Ms. Scully, perhaps I am!" And then he just burst out laughing. When he caught his breath, he stated quietly , "I do love her you know." "I know, Walter, I know, because if you didn't, well I pack a gun, ya know?" she retorted with a tease. Then, quietly she added, "and Mulder... Walter, you really love him too, don't you?" Dana watched him fight himself ever so slightly with his emotions. She knew she might have been overstepping her bounds, but she had to know...she had to know for sure that if she walked out of this bathroom feeling almost whole, she had to have someone out there to hold Mulder together on those days when she felt, well... incomplete. Dana had to know Mulder's Abah would be there to help her help him. She saw Walter look at her, doubting his own ability to be as open as she needed him to be. But in the end, he found it wasn't so difficult. In the end, it was, in fact, quite easy. "I love him very much," he said in a whisper. The tears started to flow again, but with no regrets. Dana grasped Walter's hand with her own, and patted them gently. Then he grasped her hands firmly. "Before we go out," he began tentatively, " I need to make sure you know something. Yes, I plan on being around for your mother for a very long time, or for the rest of our lives, whichever is longer." Scully smiled at that. Then he continued more confidently, "I will also always be there for Fox, because he needs me, and yes, I need him. I love him as the son I'll never have, and I pray to God he will love me as the father he's always needed. "But I want you to realize how much... how I feel about..." The confidence wavered now. "Oh God, this is hard. Dana, I would never, ever presume to think that I... I mean, I know you could never see me... as a replacement for your father. He was a good and loving husband to Maggie, and he was a fine father to you and your brothers and sister. I know that, really, I do. "But, Dana, I need you to know, that even if your mom and I don't stay together, which is a ridiculous thought to even contemplate because she has to marry me since her daughter gave me the okay, right?" Walter finally stopped and came up for air. "I'm sorry, this isn't coming out right. Look, all I want you to realize is that I'll always be Mulder's Abah, and, well, if you want, I'll be there for you too. I'll be your Abah too, Dana." He stopped and took a deep breath. Upon hearing Walter's offer, Dana was quiet for a few minutes. "Walter," Dana said, "It's kind of amazing, isn't it? "What is?" "Well, when I was a child, my father used to read to me from Moby Dick. His nickname for me was Starbuck, and I used to call him Ahab." Dana drew in a deep breath. Dana watched Walter's expression turn from confusion to understanding in just moments. "Yes, I guess it is kind of amazing, isn't it?" "Is it just a coincidence, Sir?" Scully asked quietly. "I think Mulder would want us think it was fate, a reason to believe. Ahab. Abah. We _both_ believe in you. Accept that all of us believe in you, but Dana, sweetheart, believe in yourself." "I want to believe." Scully looked up at Walter, her mentor and friend, drinking in the kindness and love he so unselfishly shared with her. "I really want to believe, Abah." She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek, and he in turn reached out and hugged her. She returned the warm embrace and then both stood up to face the family, together. When she emerged from her sanctuary she immediately looked at Mulder. His face said it all, fear. He was no longer laying on the sofa bed, he was sitting...no more like hovering on its edge. She walked over to him and sat down next to him. "Hi," she said. "Hi," he said back. "Ready for that nap now?" she asked. "Scully, are you okay?" "I'm fi___." She stopped herself from saying those infamous words, because she knew they weren't totally true. "Okay, I'm a little stressed out, but I've got a pretty damned fine support system to help me out." "Actually, to help both of us, so I'm doing better. Mulder, I am going to be fine. I believe that now." Scully looked over at Walter and smiled knowingly. "We're _both_ going be okay. It's going to take work, but we're going to be just fine." She watched the worry lines on his face begin to fade. "Okay," he replied. "Can we please take our nap now? I think I'm getting cranky." He gave Dana one of his patented lopsided smiles and they both chuckled. "And you can be such a bear when you're cranky! Come on, lay down." She gently pushed him down and they both scooted up to the head of the bed so they could stretch out more comfortably. They wrapped their arms around one another, murmured sweet nothings into each other's ears, and quickly fell asleep. End of part 3/7 Email: STPteach@aol.com Abah IV: Point of View by Susan Proto Disclaimer in part 1. Part 4/7 Meanwhile, Skinner had joined Maggie and Elizabeth in the kitchen. He saw Elizabeth looked ghostly pale, and Maggie didn't look much better. Walter was fairly certain Maggie was filling Elizabeth in on the nature of Dana's illness, and how Mulder and Scully believed the cause laid with Cancerman, a/k/a Jack Stein. "My God, Maggie, I didn't know," Elizabeth gasped. "I can't imagine how you've all been dealing with it and then with Fox's illness on top of everything! Oh, Maggie, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." Oddly, Maggie Skinner began consoling Elizabeth Mulder about her daughter's condition. Skinner walked over to Maggie and put his arms around her waist. He felt she was the one who really needed the TLC, and didn't feel any qualms about providing it. "The children are taking their naps now, Moms." He smiled as he offered the latest Mulder-Scully kids update. "Elizabeth, do you mind if I borrow Maggie for a little while?" "No, no of course not. I think I may go lay down myself," she replied. She clutched Maggie Scully's hand one more time and squeezed it. She wondered if she could ever be as selfless and strong as this woman. Here she was, loving and supporting her and her son, when all the while she was facing the possible death of her own daughter. And all because... *Oh God, it can't be true. Jack can't be behind Dana's cancer. He just can't be..,* she prayed silently to herself. When Maggie and Walter found themselves alone in the warm, expansive Scully kitchen, they reached to embrace one another. Walter Skinner found a security and comfort he hadn't felt since the days he spent at Mary's Eatery in Viet Nam, waiting to go for a walk with his beloved Lin. Now he found himself in the arms of another beloved. "Your daughter and I had a nice long talk in there. She's a strong girl, Maggie. Chip off the old block!" "Watch who you're calling old, G-Man!" Maggie teased. "Oh, Maggie, Dana's just like you. She's wonderful, beautiful, and strong. She will get through this. We'll help her...I'll help her." He paused a moment, as he tried to reign in his emotions. "She said I could help her, Maggie." At this Skinner choked back a small sob. He was still feeling overwhelmed at gaining Dana's acceptance and trust. He shuddered slightly and then smiled. "She also gave me permission to ask you for your hand in marriage, Margaret," he said softly. Maggie looked up at his face feeling a thrill, but also shock , at hearing those words. It took a moment before Maggie found her voice. "Oh she did, did she? And why do you suppose she did that?" "Because she knows how much you love me?" At that, Maggie gently poked him on his shoulder, so he continued, "Or maybe because she knows how much I love you." No question that time. Simple statement of fact. "I love you too, Walter. I haven't felt this close to a man since I fell in love with Bill. But I won't lie. I'm a little scared at the prospect of going through that again." "Me too, but we're worth it, aren't we? I love you so much, Margaret Scully. I really would be honored if you would consent to be my wife." "I love you too, Walter, but isn't it a little soon to be talking marriage? We've only been together for the last month or so." "Seems like a lifetime though, doesn't it?" With that, they embraced one another again, and held each other for a very long time. #################################################### Dana wasn't sure what Walter said, or how he said it, but she figured he went into FBI Assistant Director mode in order to get Mulder his doctor appointments for the next day. She didn't think it was possible, but he did it. Dana imagined a caged tiger wouldn't be as jumpy and angry as Mulder was right now. She knew how he hated waiting for doctors' appointments. She empathized and wished, just once, when they made a 2:30 appointment, the doctor would see them at 2:30. If she were in her own practice, that would be a priority. *Of course as a forensic pathologist, time wouldn't be much of a priority with her patients, now would it?* Dana chuckled to herself. She watched Mulder stand up, desperately wanting to pace, but saw he got dizzy and forced himself to sit back down in the hard, uncomfortable, ugly green plastic chair. Waiting. She knew how much he hated waiting! It was going on 3:10, and there were still other people who appeared to have been ahead of them. "Shit, that's it Scully. Let's get the hell out of here," he seethed. "Mulder, sit down. The audiologist will see you in just a little bit. Come on, would you just try to relax?" At that, Mulder turned his head away. "Do you want a magazine?" When she received no response, Scully touched his shoulder to regain his attention. "Do you want a magazine?" she repeated. He shook his head glumly and sat impatiently. She knew what was bothering him. His hearing improved a great deal, but it wasn't a hundred per cent better yet, and he was worried. Hell, she was worried. If there was permanent damage, he would be tested for hearing aids, and if they didn't bring his hearing to within an acceptable normal range, he would be relieved of field duties. He would lose the X-Files. The resources he needed for his search for the truth and for his sister would be severely limited. Scully knew how important the search for his sister was to him. Before they had become so important to one another, she knew that finding his sister was the singular most important goal in his life. Once Mulder realized how important she was to him, the plan changed to include Scully in his search for the truth. Scully knew she couldn't do it without him. As badly as she wanted to find out the truth, it was still his need, his drive, his raison d'etre, that carried them in their quest. She didn't know if she would be able to carry on the search without him. She sure as hell didn't want to have to find out. "Mr. Mulder? Mr. Fox Mulder?" Scully nudged him, and he looked up at the receptionist. "Mr. Mulder? Ah, good, come with me, please." He stood up and grabbed the dreaded walker. His balance was still way off, though with the walker he was able to stabilize himself more easily. He and Scully followed the receptionist into the exam room. Scully watched from the outer waiting area. Mulder's back was towards her, so she couldn't see his facial expressions, though from the continuous motion of his arms and legs she could tell he was nervous. They hoped the tests would prove that more improvement could be expected, but there was no way of knowing for sure. The audiologist performed two basic tests. A tuning fork test and a pure-tone audiometry test. The first was to confirm that there was no conductive hearing loss in addition to the sensorineural loss he experienced as a result of the inner ear infection from the meningitis. Next, Scully watched the audiologist prepare Mulder for the pure-tone test, using the audiometer. She handed Mulder written instructions to which she observed him nodding his head while he read. When the audiologist got his attention, Mulder indicated he understood the procedure. She watched as the audiologist used an audiometer and tested Mulder's ability to hear sounds of different frequencies and intensities. The sounds were transmitted through ear phones, first one ear and then the other, at different levels. Mulder gave a hand signal whenever he heard a sound through the headphone. The audiologist sat behind a screen so Mulder couldn't use visual cues to determine if sound was being transmitted. The testing did not take long, but they both knew Mulder still needed to see the Ear Nose & Throat specialist. They were going to his nearby office as soon as they were done with the audiologist, who was going to fax the results over to the doctor's office as soon as possible. End of part 4/7 email: STPteach@aol.com ***************************************************** Abah IV: Point of View by Susan Proto Disclaimers in part 1 Part 5/7 *Poor Mulder,* Scully thought as she observed the Ear, Nose and Throat specialist examine him. She knew how much he hated being poked and prodded and doctors in general. *It's a wonder he lets me hang around him at all,* she mused. Perhaps the phobia was a result of the too many times he had found himself in an emergency room because of his father's abusive behavior toward him. Mulder, of course, brushed it off and said he just hated needles. When the ENT specialist finished his examination, he scribbled some notes on Mulder's chart. "Mr. Mulder, Ms. Scully, please join me in my office." Mulder had left the walker in the waiting room, because the hallway and examining room were so small and narrow, with a few steps leading up and down into each area. Scully thought it was rather ironic how doctors' offices were so often not architecturally barrier free. Mulder held onto Scully's arm with one hand and palmed the wall with his other hand to help maintain his balance. Scully realized his gait was really awkward, and wondered if his balance problems were really all due to the vertigo. She waited while Mulder sat himself down in the chair opposite the specialist's desk. She sat in the other seat. Scully smiled as she looked at their positions. It felt like deja vu, as they used to sit in these very positions in AD Skinner's office. *AD Skinner... Abah... How times changed,* she thought. But to Dana, it felt like just yesterday, and yet at the same time, it felt like a lifetime ago. "Well Doc, what's the verdict. Am I going to get the rest of my hearing back, soon?" Mulder asked with false confidence. "You do like to cut to the chase, don't you Mr. Mulder?" Dr. Lansing asked. "Okay, I can take a hint." Now that the verdict was about to be read, Mulder looked ready to bolt. Anticipating the best possible scenario and having to actually face the worst possible scenario are two different things indeed. Scully placed her hand in his and intertwined their fingers. She wanted him to know they were going to face this together, no matter what the diagnosis and prognosis. "Well there's been a significant improvement from your last test. That is good. However there's still fluid in your ears and still signs of infection. This is not so good, because it means you will still feel the symptoms of the inner ear infection. I see your balance is still out of whack. Has that improved at all?" Simultaneously, Mulder said "Yes," and Scully said, "No." Each looked at the other in surprise. "But I am walking better now, Scully." Scully shook her head slightly at him and then turned and spoke to the specialist. She went into full Dana Scully, MD mode. "Doctor Lansing, he's still totally dependent upon the walker or someone assisting him. His gait remains awkward and unsteady. He has improved somewhat using the walker, but he has not shown any real improvement in walking independently." Dr. Lansing no longer directed his conversation to Mulder, but instead looked directly at Dana. "When was the last time he saw the neurologist?" Scully was about to answer when Mulder cut her off. "Umm, excuse me?" Mulder looked pissed off. "Doc, Elvis has not left the building. I am still seated here in your office, am I not?" "Mr. Mulder, I was merely asking__," "Then ask __me__. I am not a child who needs to be spoken around," he retorted angrily. "I apologize, Mr. Mulder. It was not my intent to insult you," placated Dr. Lansing. Upon receiving an acknowledging nod from Mulder, he continued, " So, when was the last time you were examined by the neurologist?" Scully observed Mulder's reaction to the doctor's question and realized immediately there was a problem. *He doesn't have a clue,* she thought. She touched his arm to get his attention. "Mulder wasn't it last Monday or Tuesday?" she asked quickly. *Come on, Mulder, go with the upbeat,* she urged silently. "What?" he questioned. Then with just a glance of silent thanks, "Scully, I can speak for myself, you know?" He turned to look at the doctor. "Doctor, it was last Tuesday, because I remember being pissed off that I had to miss most of the Yankees-Seattle game." "Do you recall what the results were?" he asked looking directly at Mulder. "Yes," he said confidently. "He said the scans looked clean with the exception of the inner ear infection." Scully knew Mulder remembered that part clearly, because they both felt so relieved. No brain damage. Their biggest fear was unfounded. "Okay, then. Let's give the medication a little longer to work on the Labyrinthitis infection. There's still some swelling and fluid in the inner ear, so it's difficult to assess how much permanent damage there is." Scully looked immediately at Mulder as she watched him startle at the doctor's words. Mulder quickly cut in, "Permanent? What kind of permanent damage? I thought the antibiotics would clear everything up and that would be the end of it." "And that's still possible, Mr. Mulder. I can't say for sure," he replied. "But I don't want to leave you thinking that there is no possible aftereffects from the Labyrinthitis. That's a serious infection that effects a very delicate part of the inner ear." The doctor then added, as gently as possible, "Mr. Mulder, I won't lie to you. I would be very surprised if there was no aftereffects." Scully gasped as one with Mulder. This was supposed to be a day of _good_ news. He had gained so much of hearing back, and the doctors were supposed to tell them what a miraculous recovery he was having and say we could expect him to be on the job by early next week! But this was not the case. Permanent damage. The doctor seemed pretty sure about that. The question remained as to just how serious the damage would be. "How serious could it be?" she asked quietly. "I would say no more serious than it is now." "But his balance is still so poor,"she said. "I'm going to recommend the use of hearing aids, Mr. Mulder. They may help with your sense of balance, by giving you a better sense as to where you are in space. If nothing else, they should help you to follow conversations with more than one person more easily, as they will amplify the sounds around you as well as those directly in front of you." Scully watched Mulder sit stoned face. He didn't seem to react to the doctor's recommendation except for the one small wince at the mention of hearing aids. Scully suddenly wished Skinner was here. "We're going to provide you with some loaners. The audiologist sent a messenger over with a pair for you to borrow until yours are ready. Remember he made some wax molds of your ears in his office?" Mulder nodded. "Well, a pair of aids will be made up with your ears' configurations. Mr. Mulder, they really should help you hear better, and hopefully have a positive effect on your balance." The doctor went over the design of the loaner aids. He explained to Mulder how to adjust the volume depending upon the kind sound environment he was in. Then he showed him how to insert them in his ears. If there were any additional adjustments needed, he would probably need to go back to the audiologist. Scully watched Mulder's facial expression change over and over again. When the doctor put the hearing aids in his ears, she saw him react with surprise? Pain? Fear? Pleasure? Discomfort? She found it so hard to tell. "Mulder, how do they feel?" she asked. "I'm not sure. How do they look?" he asked tentatively. Scully knew what he was asking, she just wasn't sure how to respond. She had never thought of Mulder as vain, but she knew he was self-conscious. He was worried others would see him as handicapped when he wore the hearing aids. It was bad enough to be thought of as "Spooky" Mulder, but the idea of others thinking he was handicapped or crippled would be too much for him. "They look like hearing aids, Mulder." Scully felt the best tact to take was the honest, no holds bar one. "Do you sense a difference in your hearing?" "It may take a little time for Mr. Mulder to adapt to the new sounds, Ms. Scully," Dr. Lansing interjected. "Kind of like when you get a new prescription for your eyeglasses. You know they help you see better, but everything seems a little skewed for awhile until you get used to them. "Loud." Mulder said it with little emotion. She could tell he wasn't sure if the benefits outweighed the possible detriments. "Mr. Mulder, I want to see you next week for a follow-up. By then the infection should have had a chance to clear up and we can check your hearing again as well. Make an appointment at the desk, and ask Carol to call over to the audiologist's office for a follow-up appointment there too." He stood up and offered his hand to Mulder and Scully. As Mulder went to stand, Scully automatically reached over and offered her assistance, which Mulder automatically accepted. No miracle cure these hearing aids, at least not yet. He still felt as though he were teetering on the edge of the world. Scully drove Mulder back to her mom's house. He didn't initiate conversation and neither did she, but she did look over at him every now and then. She felt like she was watching one of her seven year old nephews. She saw him looking out the window. He turned his head to the right, to the left, up, and down. Sometimes he looked back at her, but he hid his emotions then. Only when she could catch a glimpse of him reacting to some sound he hadn't heard in a long time did she see a glimpse of his feelings. "We're home Mulder," she said to the back of his head. "I know," he responded as he turned around to face him. Scully reached over to kiss him. He had heard her even though he wasn't facing her. He could hear with them. Mulder returned her kiss and then smiled. "Maybe these things won't be so bad," he said. She watched him push the walker up the ramp to her mom's front door. He waited while Scully opened the screen door for him. "Hi Moms, we're home," he called out. When Skinner appeared, Mulder looked at him and smirked, "Why Mom, I love what you've done with your hair." "Funny, Mulder, very funny. Hello Dana." "Hi Walter. Where's Mom and Elizabeth?" she asked. "I kicked them out." End of part 5/7 Email to: STPteach@aol.com ***************************************************** Abah IV: Point of View by Susan Proto Disclaimers in Part 1 Part 6/7 "You what?" Mulder said. "I kicked them out," he reiterated. "I told them they needed a break. So I gave them some mad money and told them to buy something totally frivolous for themselves. Both moms were ready to refuse, but I insisted and off they went." Scully watched Skinner and thought she had never seen him so animated or so obviously pleased with himself. He was positively beaming! "That was a very nice thing to do, Walter," Mulder said quietly. "Thank you for doing that for them." "Yes, thank you," Scully added as she watched Mulder. She knew his mood changed suddenly, but she wasn't absolutely sure why. Then she saw him looking at Skinner and then looking down at his walker. *Oh Mulder,* she cried to herself. *Soon you'll be able to do things for your family instead of them just doing for you. Soon, you'll see.* But Skinner picked up on his mood change as well. "Mulder, I wanted some quiet time for me, ya know? Sometimes all this togetherness can get a little stifling. So when you guys left for the doctors' appointments, I figured this was my opportunity for some peace and quiet. You'd have done the same thing, wouldn't you have?" Scully wanted to give Walter S. Skinner a big bear hug and kiss. How did this man know just what to say to keep Mulder from going off the deep end? She saw Mulder's smile return as he nodded. Yes, he would have done the same thing as Walter had he had the chance. "So, what did the doctors have to say?" he asked. Scully and Mulder both reviewed the results of the various tests and examinations. Mulder modeled his new, loaner, hearing aids and informed Walter that he would probably get a new set by next week. "Do they help?" Skinner asked. "Yeah, I think they do." Mulder appeared almost surprised at himself for having said that. Scully laughed out loud. "What?" Mulder looked at Scully questioningly. "You should have seen him on the ride home. He couldn't get enough of the sounds from the road. He reminded me of my nephew," she relayed chuckling all the while. "Gee thanks, Scully." "No problem, Mulder." "Okay children, truce!" Walter said laughingly. Dana and Fox both looked at him and replied, simultaneously, "Yes, Abah." Scully looked at Fox and then back at Walter. She saw Fox was surprised to hear her refer to Walter as Abah, but it was Walter's expression that grabbed her attention. She watched as his mouth gaped open and his eyes welled up. He stared at her and Mulder for the longest time. Scully then glanced at Mulder and their skills at silent communication were obviously still intact, because once again they acted in tandem and both reached for Walter at the same time. She felt Walter's arm wrap around her shoulder and saw him do the same to Fox with his other arm. Mulder and Scully reached for each other as well as well as Skinner. They stayed embraced in a basic bear hug for a few moments, and all drank in the good feelings. Scully felt her Abah kiss the top of her forehead gently and then watched as he repeated the gesture on Fox's forehead. She wondered if she had ever felt or seen a more tender moment than the one she had just experienced. The silence of the moment was broken when the door swung open announcing the two Moms were home. "Anyone home?" called out Maggie. "Walter? Are the kids home yet?" "Out in the kitchen, Maggie." Scully felt Walter release her to go meet her mom and Elizabeth. Mulder, on the other hand, continued to cling to her. "Hello everyone," Maggie announced. Elizabeth followed with her own salutations and Scully noted that both women looked happy and relaxed. "You gals look like you were busy today," Walter observed out loud. "Walter, I want to thank you for kicking us out of the house. It was truly a splendid day," Elizabeth beamed. Walter walked over to Maggie and wrapped his arms around her. "So, was it really splendid, or is Elizabeth just being polite?" Walter asked with the biggest shit eaten grin on his face. He knew the answer the moment he saw her enter the room. She looked so energized, but in a relaxed sort of way. "Yes, it was wonderful. Thank you, sweetheart." Scully continued to find it just a tad strange to hear her mom call her boss "sweetheart,' but she figured if she could call him Abah, her mom could call him anything she wanted! Fox let go of Scully to walk over to his mother. Elizabeth looked at her son and reached up with her hands to touch the hearing aids. Scully saw him flinch slightly, but he didn't pull away. "How do they feel, Fox?" Elizabeth asked. "Okay, I guess." Mulder spoke softly, as though he didn't want to draw attention to himself. Scully wondered if he would ever become less self conscious about them. She found it ironic that he was annoyed about having to use the walker, but he was almost embarrassed about having to use the hearing aids. "Do they help your hearing, dear?" "Yes, Mom. I believe they do, but I'm still not quite used to hearing all of these sounds, so I can't always decipher everything that's being said when more than one sound is occurring at once. But the doctor said it just takes time to get used to 'em." Scully was relieved to hear him sound so calm and matter of fact about the hearing aids. Apparently he'd accepted them more easily than she had credited him for. "Fox," Elizabeth continued, "what did the doctor say about your hearing? When will the infection clear up? And how long do you need to wear those things?" This time Scully winced when she heard Elizabeth refer to the hearing aids as "things." *No wonder he feels embarrassed. _She's_ embarrassed,* Dana thought angrily. Then Scully saw her mom walk over to Fox. "Show me how they work, Fox," she said. *Go Mom,* Scully cheered silently. She looked up at Walter who was also smiling and shaking his head ever so slightly when he caught Scully's eye. The two of them connected and Scully knew Walter was well aware of her mom's good deed. She watched Fox take one of the aids out to show both her mom and Elizabeth. He explained about the volume control and how he would have to use his judgment depending upon the sound environment he was in at the given time. He also explained these were loaners, and that aids designed specifically for his ears would be ready by next week. "You're going to need to wear them permanently?" Elizabeth asked. "There's a good possibility that I might, Mom." Fox looked down toward the floor as he gave his mother that information. "Oh no!" she gasped. I thought the doctor said the antibiotics would clear up the infection?" Elizabeth said in a tight voice. "He did, Mom." Scully saw him look at her for support. He was getting upset with his mother, and he wasn't sure how to explain without becoming more upset and upsetting her as well. "Elizabeth, even though the antibiotics should clear up the infection, there's no way of knowing if the infection hadn't already caused some permanent damage. So, Mulder may need to wear the aids permanently, but as long as they improve his hearing to within acceptable levels, what difference does it make?" Scully glared at Elizabeth at this point, almost as if to dare her to say something mean and negative. Elizabeth returned the glare. She realized Dana Scully was annoyed with her, though she really wasn't sure why. All she wanted was the best for her son and for him to be healthy and happy.... and perfect. And if he had to wear hearing aids, then he would no longer be perfect. And Fox had to be perfect. He _had_ to be perfect, or _he_ would..... "Oh, of course," she began, "Well you know they've made such vast improvements in hearing aids, dear. I've read that they've designed some aids so that they're invisible to on the outside of the ear. Can you imagine? Amazing what technology can do nowadays, isn't it?" Dana didn't know if she wanted to choke her or not waste the time and just get her gun out and shoot her right then and there. Walter sidled up to her, placed his hand on her shoulder, and gently squeezed it. She felt his calming influence pour into her, and realized shooting Elizabeth was not the answer, at least not at the moment. "Mulder, I'm starving and I'm tired. How about you?" she asked in an attempt to change the subject as quickly as possible. "Yeah, I think I'd like to grab a quick bite and then take a nap. I suddenly feel exhausted," he acknowledged. "Okay," said Walter, "I just happen to have some soup warming on the stove and some sandwiches wrapped up in the fridge." "Sounds like a plan to me," Scully said. "I'll set the table." The quintet ate their lunch and kept the discussion to the ladies' mall experiences. The Moms wanted to share their purchases with everyone after they finished eating. Neither bought _one_ frivolous thing, instead they bought several gifts for the people sitting in the room. Maggie pulled out a package of diskettes for Walter, as he was complaining he didn't have enough to keep up with all of the work he'd been taking home to the Scully homestead. She included one frivolous gift for him, a computer game by George Lucas, he had mentioned once in passing. She then pulled out a lovely pair of turquoise and silver earrings for Dana to which she properly oohed and ahhed. Maggie explained they would set her eyes off beautifully, and Fox readily agreed with her. Dana chuckled at that, and kissed both her mom and Mulder thanks. Finally, for Fox, she found something that she wasn't sure if he would appreciate or not. Maggie had learned something new about Fox William Mulder from his mother over their café au lait. When she saw the item in the store, Maggie knew she wanted to give it to him. She just hoped he would understand her good intentions. Dana watched Mulder open the small box from the same jewelry store from which her mom had purchased her earrings. He lifted the lid and Dana saw his eyes open wide and then begin to well up with tears. She leaned over to see inside the box was a beautiful, contemporary designed, silver and turquoise Star of David. Mulder looked up at Maggie. Scully wasn't sure what to think. *Why would Mom get him a Jewish star?* she thought. Of course, it then occurred to her that Elizabeth had told her mom they were Jewish. *But Mulder doesn't practice Judaism,* she thought. *But I'm not a practicing Catholic either,* she realized as she fingered the cross around her neck. The cross her mother bought for her when she was just a teenager. The cross that Mulder held for her until she returned to him after being missing for three months. Scully realized that if anyone else, other than Maggie Scully, had given him that Star of David, Mulder probably would have politely thrown it back in their face. But this was a gift from her mom, and she knew her intent was to neither judge nor influence. It was merely a reminder that faith comes in all forms, and that this was but one of many. "Thank you, Mom," Mulder whispered through tears. "I'll wear it always." He took it out of the box and handed it to Dana. She placed it around his neck and clasped it securely in place. She whispered into his ear how beautiful it was and gently kissed him on the cheek. End of part 6/7 Email to: STPteach@aol.com Abah IV: Point of View by Susan Proto Disclaimers in Part 1 Part 7/7 Dana sat back down and watched Elizabeth. Once again, Dana felt a little bit of pity for the woman. It must be hard to hear Fox call another woman "Mom" with such ease. She didn't look jealous, but Scully did feel she saw a sense of longing that hadn't been there before. Elizabeth pulled her bags out and informed everyone she too had some frivolous presents to share. For Walter, she announced, was the hint book that went with the game Maggie had bought for him. She realized as an Assistant Director of the FBI, he probably didn't have the time to spend too much time trying to figure out the tricks of the game totally by himself, so she hoped this would help. Walter indicated he was eternally grateful for the extra help, though he wasn't sure if he should be insulted or not since Elizabeth apparently assumed he could not find his way out of a paper bag without help. Scully did note, however, that he showed the courtesy to smile as he spoke. Next, Elizabeth pulled out a lovely boxed variety set of herbal teas and another which held a different flavored coffees. These she handed to Maggie, and as she did, she let Maggie know that there was no way that these small tokens could even begin to compensate her for all that she did for her and her son. But it was supposed to be frivolous and she thought Maggie would enjoy them. Maggie smiled and said these were _hers_ and under no circumstances was anyone to go near her personal, private stash! Scully laughed along with everyone else because she knew her mother really would hide them. She couldn't have survived living with a husband and four kids without having had some tricks up her sleeve. Next she looked at Dana and her son. She moved to sit down on the coffee table directly in front of them. "I don't have anything else in the bag," she said quietly. Dana looked quizzically at Elizabeth and then at Fox. She couldn't understand what, if any, point Elizabeth was trying to make. Dana began, "Elizabeth, it's okay. I didn't expect you to___" She watched Elizabeth shake her head no, as she cut Dana off. "No, Dana. It's not that I didn't want to give you and Fox a gift. I do. It's just that I didn't want this one to be a frivolous one." Dana felt nervous for some reason. She grabbed Mulder's hand and intertwined her fingers with his. She looked at him and saw his face had paled. He was as uncomfortable as she was. "Mom," he began, "what are you talking about?" Next, Dana looked at Walter and saw he was fumbling with his watch. He seemed to be just as anxious as she and Mulder. The only one who seemed to be calm was Maggie. "Mom," Scully said, "do you know what's going on here?" "No, I don't know exactly, but I have a feeling," Maggie responded. Dana looked back at Elizabeth who she saw was now smiling toward Maggie, but then returned her gaze back to her and Fox. "I didn't want it to be frivolous, because frivolous is something you don't need right now. We'll save that for later, after you're married." Scully's jaw dropped at that comment, as did Fox's. Skinner just choked out loud and Maggie merely smiled and nodded in agreement. "No," Elizabeth continued, "for now you need a necessity. "Fox, I know you don't hold me in the same regard as you do Maggie here," Mulder gasped at this comment, but Elizabeth shushed him up quickly. "Oh my darling son, I know you love me. You'll always love me, and for that I am grateful, but I know I was not the mother you needed when you were growing up." Scully watched this performance in amazement. She thought Elizabeth was being sincere. She prayed she was being sincere, because the last thing Mulder needed now was to be figuratively kicked in the balls by his own mother, which was still a real possibility in her mind. "But I want to try to make up for it now," Elizabeth continued. "I know we'll never have the kind of relationship you dreamed of having, but I want to try to achieve some kind of closeness with you Fox. And with you too, Dana. It's obvious how much you love each other, and for that I am so happy. I'm so grateful my son is finally going to find some happiness in his life. "So, you can imagine how shocked I was when I found out about your condition, Dana." *There it was! The proverbial kick in the balls!! She's going to say something that will make him feel guilty! I should have realized she couldn't do one damned act of kindness without chewing Mulder up and then spitting him out! Damn her! Damn her mouth!* Scully was seething. She squeezed Mulder's hand tighter to let him know that she was there and she would protect him from this Mother from Hell. Dana frantically looked at Walter. She saw him sit up straighter and tauter. "Dana, Fox, please listen to me. I don't want to make things worse. I want to try to make things better. You see, I didn't buy anything at the mall that could be taken out of a bag and handed to you today. But it is my intention to give you something, something vital to both of you." Dana wasn't sure what Elizabeth was talking about. She knew she was feeling queasy and wondered if Fox was feeling equally ill at ease. She saw Skinner was now sitting on the edge of his seat, ready to pounce at a given moment. In fact, just then he rose from the chair and sat down next to Mulder on the couch. Maggie also rose, and sat on the floor by Skinner's legs. "Elizabeth, what the hell are you talking about?" Skinner asked in an irritated tone of voice. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to sound so cryptic, I merely want you.... all of you, to understand. Please, understand I have never, ever, wanted to hurt you, Fox. I've never wanted to hurt anyone." "Mom, please. What's going on? Cause right now you're killing me," Mulder pleaded. Scully felt his hand squeeze tighter. She also noticed Skinner reaching around Mulder's shoulder and her own. "Fox," Elizabeth Mulder said softly, "my gift to you is Dana." Mulder looked dazed. Scully didn't feel any less confused than he did. Elizabeth turned to Dana. "Dana, my gift to you is Fox." Scully felt dizzy. *Fox was crying. Why is he crying? Does he understand what she's doing? What is she doing to him? To me? I don't understand.* She looked at Walter. Scully asked aloud, "Abah? What is she doing?" Walter smiled at her and squeezed her shoulder. Then he turned to Elizabeth Mulder. "Elizabeth, tell them what you did," he said quietly, but firmly. "I made a phone call. I just made a phone call. He owed me, Walter. I told him he owed me," she whispered hoarsely, fighting back the tears. Dana suddenly realized what this woman had done. Dana didn't know whether to feel grateful or nauseous, or both. Suddenly she felt Mulder trembling, so she tried to hold him steady. "Mom?" Fox was barely able to speak. "Who did you call?" he asked quivering. Elizabeth looked tearfully at Fox, but was no longer able to hold back the tears. "I called _him_, Fox. Jack. I called Jack." End of part 7/7 The end. Please e-mail all comments to: STPteach@aol.com